The Runaway
by GothicLolita333
Summary: "When I was young,someone told me that as long as you have love,you will still have hope." A bored writer that can't find his story meets a runaway stranger. SasuNaru
1. Chapter 1:Angel on the floor

When I was younger, someone told me that as long as you have love, you will still have hope.

At that time, it meant nothing to me. I was young and for me, young means that I am still not in this world, 'cause I never saw or felt pain, for me, nothing was real.

Or maybe because I was so young, nothing was real. At least nothing was real for me.

The Runaway

Chapter 1: Angel on the floor

They say that if you have talent in anything, to paint, to carve, to sing or anything that is in the department of art, they say that if you have any of it, then you feel everything differently than the others that have no talent.

You feel everything deeper than the rest, with another significance than the ones with no talent that see nothing in simple things, and more than that, you share your pain, love, loneliness or even happiness in paintings, in sculptures, in songs and with the talent that I have, I've put all of my feelings in what I write.

I have always wanted to write a book, a book that many people will read and they will feel my anger, my loneliness, my pain, my happiness, my longing, my hunger, and above them all, they will feel my love.

But, I never really did it; I've never finished a whole story, not to mention to give it to someone to read it, not even to an acquaintance, not even to a stranger.

All of my stories have been thrown to the garbage by me. The already stuffed garbage from my apartment in which I live all alone. In my apartment in which you can hear the water drops from the faucet falling to the hard fabric of the empty sink.

After some time of frustration and white sheets, I gave up on the idea of writing a story and I decided to put the idea on hold, to let the story itself to grow its roots inside of me and when the time will come, to harvest it. I will write the story and then I will share it with the whole wide world.

A story that it's so wonderful, so beautiful and so outstanding, marvelous and so exciting, that no matter who will read it, to absolutely fall in love with it.

But until then, I decided to put all of my feelings in poems.

I've thought that I always had words in me which cannot be written in stories, and that I can write them; paint them and carve them in the art of poetry.

But as soon as I've started, it happened that all of my beautiful words have been suddenly drowned by my too strong feelings that had easily taken the whole control of me, and of my poems.

At first, I wrote about angels, but it had nothing to do with religion or nothing to do with more than my simple, my ridiculous and my rigid feelings, no poetry.

The only real and content structure my feelings could ever give was always just the last stanza:

"If this isn't true, then I will just die for my heart to feel free

And this time, I have no escape,

I can't work hard if I see myself crying every single day,

And I know this can't be a lie, when I want to escape,

Is this how it's supposed to be?

To want to die more than you want to live?"

Even if many of my poems had something more than simple words or maybe, something beautiful in them, they still weren't enough poetic for me, and some of them didn't had really anything poetic in them, not to mention, no rhyme, and even if I know that there are poems without rhyme, I never have liked those poems, so why my own poems have not even one stanza that rhymes?

They are like songs about feelings, but I cannot sing, so they are not even songs, not even stories, and not even poems.

My loneliness slowly suffocates me, in its silence and darkness as the wind that came from the open window that could take me away even more easily with its mystery, and to let me fly with him. But for just a second.

Because after that second, I was still a prisoner of my own gift from God, prisoner in my own body and prisoner with my incapability to do something with my meaningless life.

I always wanted to be a writer, to write at least a book, but I was a writer that indeed, writes, a writer that doesn't even likes what he writes but still writes, and in the end thinks that he can do better, but that will happen, maybe …next time.

As always, if not trying to escape the madness that tried to seduce me in my own apartment, I got out of my lovely cage and I even closed the door with the key, so that the bad luck to remain inside of it, as I got out of my apartment, starting my walk with my left foot, as always forgetting to start it with my right foot for luck.

As always, I wanted to walk through the park alone, and to think and to see, that maybe, the inspiration will suddenly hit my mind, or maybe, I used this excuse to make my routine walk to clear my head, to hear sounds, to feel the wind all around me and not just in front of me as it does in my apartment when the wind comes from the open window.

Maybe the lake from the park will make a smell that I could taste with my nose, maybe the moon will be on the sky and maybe, my poem or my story will come, with the wind, with the smell and with the noise of some other humans that could walk with me, beside me.

But as always, I came to walk in the park too late, because as always, it's night.

And so, there it's almost no one in this whole park. Just empty banks and an empty lake, a quiet atmosphere, a calm breeze often wakes me up from my thoughts but after a while, I didn't felt anything, nor the wind, nor the incredibly almost inexistent smell from the lake, and not even the full moon that has entertained me enough to look at it often and then at the road, again and again.

It all begun to be a picture that I cannot paint. A man that walks in the park at night, where the wind is too calm, the park is too empty, the lake smells almost the same as the ground, and the words, still unwritten and it all became beyond description.

It was too much, this unchangeable routine wants to eat me endlessly and who am I to say no? And with what change could I deny its structure that seems to be immune to my constant desire to burn it, as a painting that can't be redone, a painting that has been exposed to millions of people that can't forget how it looked like, the first eyes that have seen, the millions of eyes that have made photos of this very painting for its own brain connected with those very eyes.

Unchangeable as this, was my routine that could never be changed no matter how much I wish I could remake the painting, to even erase it if it's possible, to just explain them that the way the painting is now, it's not right, not perfect, not even close to comfort.

At least not for me, but for them, for people that don't even know me, for people that don't care about me, why would they let me to change or to erase my own painting when they would simply just let it as it is right now.

Because they don't need it, to feel it, to live it, some of them, often watch it how a man walks besides them without knowing nothing.

And who am I to say that they should care? When I walk beside so many people, so many untold stories, so fakes smiles on so many faces that I don't know, masks like my own, and I don't care, and I don't recognize.

'Who am I to judge them?'

I thought it while I sigh, and I looked just in front of me, at the unchangeable view. I look at the small pavement of the park and at the green tress, not too high, nor too small, but while they are dancing a little with the kind breeze of the quiet wind while the noisy ones are the leaves.

The lake at my right, and the road in front of me, while …

"Hello old man."

I've quickly looked at my left at a bank that it's not empty but changed, with a boy sitting on it, in a quite rude posture, as if sleeping there but not looking like a beggar either.

"Hn."

I should walk away already, but I do not know why I stay at the right of the bank while looking at a young boy with a blue cap on his head, while rebel bright blond hairs threaten to go outside of it.

Also, bright blue eyes, outstanding blue eyes, deeper than the ocean itself and seem to expand in my vision as the sky itself.

He is young, of course, not even white and not even too tanned skin, neat and clean, flawless skin, it makes the clothes jealous.

A dark yellow jacket and a simple orange T-shirt under it, with blue pants that seem to be in trend with the young trouble makers of these years, generations, ripped or designed to look as if he just fought with a cat or dog, or both.

Sneakers as always, grey ones with missing lacings. I wonder if he lost them or removed them.

While staring at him, I could tell that he stares at me too, but what has caught my eyes is the undeniable smoke that comes from his cigarette that he holds dearly in his right hand as he enjoys it while he smokes it slowly while looking at me.

The smoke made me to stop in that place after all, but without reason, I refused to look at my left and I continued to look just in front of me. And now, we both refuse to look at any other thing, but ourselves.

As if I surprised him, even if that was my intention, I quickly took the cigarette from his hand and I've throw it close to my feet and I crashed it with my weight while his hand is still in the air, but his eyes are not on the crushed cigarette but on my eyes, deep in my eyes.

"Why did you do that old man?"

He said almost laughing at a sentence that is not a joke, but a question, a laugh so small that it seemed nervous but he seems more than relaxed and comfortable.

I sat myself beside him, at his right; I sat normally on the dark brown bank while he still stays on it like as it it's a comfortable couch and I looked forward while I know that he still looks at me, he waits for his answer.

"Because it's not good to your health."

I said and he moved, I felt him but I dared not to look at him while I've realized that he has sat himself normally on the bank too, at my left, but he doesn't looks in front of him, like me but at me.

"So, you're a cop or something?"

He asked me, but he doesn't seem frightened to ask this, and for a moment, I wanted to say yes, just to see if he would run away from me right now if my answer would be affirmative.

"Do I look like a cop to you?"

Childish, if I could only name him in any other way. He put one leg over the other one that is on the bank, and he kept them there with his two hands while he just balanced his body, back and forward while he still talks to me.

"Well, I don't know, you walk through the park at midnight so maybe you do some shitty night tour."

"Wrong."

I somehow felt like he didn't mean those words but said them just as if to continue our conversation. The same I want after all, too, because I could give all of his answers and our conversation would be long gone, but no. We continue to ask, to taunt, to talk just so we won't be just us and the silence, us and the wind, us and the empty park.

After I said just a single word and he has begun to make a sound which I cannot tell what it is, he stopped balancing and just stared at me with an expression that says that he is disturbed by something.

'Maybe he just thinks of what to say.'

I thought while I begin to search in my dark blue jeans back pockets for my cigarette package.

I've pulled it out and took one of them and put it between my lips while I lit it with one match.

The smoke from my cigarette has begun dirtying the air of the night while he begun to talk irritated.

"You tell me not to smoke, but you can?"

I knew he will wait for my answer so I inspired the poison from my cigarette to my lungs again while the evidence were left in the air and then, I've turned my head to look at him while I knew he still looks at me and that he won't look somewhere else.

I bowed my head a little closer to him so just I could gain his attention to what I say.

"You're underage, aren't you?"

I asked and he didn't seem to be surprised by my question at all, while he smiled and talked to me while he bowed his head closer to me too, copying my earlier move.

"Sure you're not a cop?"

He asked but none of us moved so I just looked forward and I took a taste from my cigarette again and then, I let it to be blown away by the small breeze that has passed and finished with my smoke in the same time.

So I looked at him again, in the same position, and I talked to him again.

"And what if I am a cop?"

I asked him and a smirk has escaped on my lips, but not a smile while he closed his eyes and then he opened them again.

He got up from the bank, made a step or two forward and then he came back to the bank, standing on his knees while looking up at me, while I am still am on the bank, and me, looking down at him.

"I don't think you are a cop, old man."

I smoke again and then I looked at him again.

"And what do you think I am, minor boy?"

He made a sound that sounded like 'hmm' and put his right hand to his chin as if he thinks about it really hard and then he reunited it with his left hand that stays comfortable on his knees.

He stopped the sound and looked at me, closer, again and then he took my cigarette that it's almost finished and he smoked what was left from it.

I stared at him, I didn't moved while all of his inhaled smoke has attacked my face, but I did not made a move, he himself with the same hand has spread it away from us the and then he spoke again.

"Perhaps, a lonely man looking for some company."

He said and then smiled at me while I cannot believe what my ears heard.

No. I am not someone that looks for simple company; I look for silence, feelings, and inspiration.

'But silence has my apartment too. Plenty of silence…'

I thought and then a sigh has escaped on my lips.

I closed my eyes and then I spoke to him while he still stared at me very attentive.

"Then what you are?"

I asked him and he smiled right away while I couldn't tell if he was amused or if he was waiting this question.

"You tell me."

An underage boy who stays in the park all alone to smoke?

I thought, but then thought twice while I realized that he stays on this bank like it's his bed, which he seems to have lost it long ago.

"A runaway?"

I asked him and his eyes grew suddenly cold and filled with sorrow.

He stood up and he looked at the lake while he made no move that he will look at me again but he spoke when I was ready to say something after such a dead silence.

"And if I would tell you that I am a runaway. What your answer will be?"

I almost felt like he stopped himself from saying other answers, answers that he has already in mind, answers that have been told to him so many times before, so I waited, until he turned around to look at me again, with bright blue eyes and with the full moon behind him, engraved in the quiet lake couldn't match the beauty his eyes that almost invited me to watch them.

I feels like you can grow tired of the moon but not of his eyes.

"What would you like me to tell you?"

I asked and I could say that he was not satisfied with my answer. He moved right and left but still stood in the same place with his legs, I could tell how nervous he is just because he didn't get a straight answer.

"I would… like you to tell me that…"

He said word by word, not a sentence, not sure of what to say, nervous, afraid or maybe just confused of what will come his way. The storm or the blazing sun, these are his only choices that could be decided just by an answer. But told by someone else but him

"Tell me your name."

I said after I've realized that he won't say any word after some seconds of pure silence.

I looked up at him and he looked down at me while he was surprised by my words.

"Naruto. My name is Naruto."

He said and in that moment, I stood up and I looked him in the eye.

"Well, Naruto, would you like me to tell you to come with me at an empty apartment, with little food in which it's too hot when it's summer and too cold in the winter, with me, a stranger?"

I asked while his smile was so big and so sad that I could not beat an eyelash until he spoke again.

"Yes, I would like this answer very much."

I could tell that no matter the fact that I could be a serial killer and my apartment to have the most despicable conditions; it would be more pleasant than to sleep on a bank in the park, all alone.

After all, I knew those feelings so well, too well.

So I sat down on the bank again, on my spot, and opened my cigarette package and I lit one cigarette,then put everything back and I can enjoy the taste, the smoke is left in the air and then my words have came with the breeze of the late summer in that day.

"Then this is your answer."

He is confused, even more than confused, the possibility that I really want to take him with me, he cannot tell if I'm serious or not. He cannot tell if he is right when he thinks that he has just received an affirmative answer. So, our game with our own words has come to an end when he asked me the final question, while he boils of curiosity.

"You mean that I can go with you, you mean that I live with you now and that…"

He said rather quickly and all that I do is to nod my head in affirmation, up and down while the air is now dirty.

While he almost jumped when he realized and ran towards me and embraced me and after some seconds of silence, he got up and talked again.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable, uh, I …don't know…"

Happy, that is the feeling that he feels in this moment, that feeling alone.

Even the fear that his expectations would be destroyed didn't dare to touch his happiness.

So, all I did was to enjoy my cigarette, while he manifested his nervousness and happiness right in front of my very eyes.

"But…"

He suddenly said and just then, I almost finished my cigarette while he spoke to me once again.

"You didn't tell me what's your name yet…"

He said and I could tell that he tried to resist the urge to say old man again and he just stared at me, waiting. While I thrown the cigarette to my feet while I stood up and crushed it in the same time under my shoe, and then, I responded him.

"Sasuke, Sasuke Uchiha."  
>To be continued…<p>

I hope everybody enjoyed the first chapter as much as I did writing it.

I apologize for the other stories that haven't been updated for some time now, but I want to let everybody know that I will update this story once per week. Today it's Sunday at me and I will probably post the next chapter the next Friday, Saturday or Sunday, in these days. And so it will all start for the next weeks if I can't or couldn't write I will post a note that says why or when the next chapter will be up like I started to write it Sunday but didn't finished until midnight so I will let you guys know that it will be out in a few hours or even the next week if I have nothing but this won't happen too soon.

I will try to keep this promise with all my might. Even if other stories won't be updated, this will be like this.

Well, the chapters are the names of the poems that are in the story. The poems are really mine, that poem was my first poem ever. And it wasn't that good but I mean it what I said in this chapter and what I will say in this story. The message I want to give and all the emotions.

The title may seem borrowed but I couldn't name it otherwise, the thing is that they won't form a band or anything, I hope I didn't disappoint anybody. The runaway is indeed Naruto if any of you had any doubts and Sasuke in a way but you will know who is and what story everybody has if you continue to read of course.

If you guys have any opinions about this story or about the name of the story it will be changed if you give me something really good but I think it fits, well with what idea I have anyway.

This probably will be the biggest AN, I won't write so much in the future, sorry for all this but you had to know all this for the future, I won't complain about anything here unless is really necessary stuff to know or something.

Well, see you next week, thank you for reading, I will wait for your opinions patiently and I will be very grateful for every word you want to show me.


	2. Chapter 2:The Grey Life

AN: Hey, I know that in this chapter there is a very very big description of the apartment and that many of you might say that I am exaggerating and that I shouldn't have described it so much from the first to the last detail but we will spend very much time in this apartment and I didn't wanted to focus on the place things but on other descriptions of feelings and such.

This will be the only chapter that will have such a big and annoying description about something like this because I didn't enjoy it very much either but please just imagine the stuff and let it like that and I promise to entertain you more in later chapters.

Thank you very much.

You told me once: "After a hurricane, a rainbow will come."

You told me those words and I've thought about it twice,

Before to tell you:

"But after the rainbow, another hurricane will come."

Chapter 2: The Grey Life

I thought that he will think of my apartment as any other normal apartment but he was intrigued by it, happy and somehow, nervous.

From the moment we entered we've done two complete different actions. And right now after half an hour, we do the same different actions.

I am standing inside, at the entrance of my apartment, at my door, while he is exploring the new territory, my apartment. He even makes comments or often asks me about this or that.

The apartment itself is not very big; I would call it a medium one. Everything that I have here it's not too expensive but nor too poor either.

The apartment consists of a big living room, that is right after you've entered through a dark brown door, it's a huge square with brown parquet, a desk that has, also, a shade of brown which is darker than the other wooden things from the apartment, of course, it has a normal chair at it, and with a window in front of it with medium white almost transparent curtains.

A big brown light bookshelf as you look in front of the room from the door, almost covering the whole wall, full with books and framed photos, and here and there, some frills.

At its left, where it has a little space where she couldn't cover it because it wasn't that big, it is a vase with fake flowers.

If you stay at the desk, on the chair, behind it, after some steps, on the other wall is a shade of black almost dark blue couch with blue and cream pillows. Under the couch it is a small rectangular carpet, that has a cream color too with no particularly design. On the wall, above the couch, it is a framed painting in which the blue ocean is painted and it is very calming at times.

At the couch's right, there is the door of my bedroom, my bedroom which consists of a normal but big bed with a white sheet and blue blanket above it, the same parquet, and before my bed it's a big closet with a long mirror on the far left on one of its doors. The closet it's also made of wood but with a medium shade of dark brown.

As you enter, if you make some steps, after the bed, there is a small table on which there are always different things like books, sheets and sometimes even food, mostly my cup of coffees, packs of cigarettes and ashtrays, and a telephone.

On the same wall with the small light brown table, above it, there is a window with the same structure as the one that is in the living room and with the same curtains; at the left of the window and of the table there is a door that is made of glass, and you can see after it but it also has white blinds which I pull them just when I sleep.

Through the door you can go on the balcony on which there is a table which I don't often use made by plastic, white and simple with two chairs at it with the exactly the same structure, and also, the floor is sandstone with the color of black and the balcony itself is made of hard cement with the color of cream, like the block itself.

As it is, there is a plant almost dying on that balcony too, and the wire on which the clean clothes are still hanged, because I've always let the clothes there too much.

The other side of the apartment, that is at the right of the entrance door, where the kitchen invites you with the simple smell of air, but its appearance is like any other kitchen, but because of its emptiness, just because I don't use it very often.

It is almost empty, the color cream, white and black.

The fridge is at the very left as you enter it from the nonexistent wall because it has no door, even if there is a little wall at the left but it has nothing, and at the right, there is just another wall where it is a window and its blinds are usually drawn.

As you enter, in front, there is the kitchens furniture that is of a light brown almost cream with a white surface on top. The sandstone is black, and the walls have half of it is tile, and the other half is a white wall like the rest of the house, the tile itself is black almost grayish.

In the middle of the principal wall, which is as you enter, in front, it's a white stove, at its close left there is an support for clean dishes of a grey metal color right after the grey sink with some glasses in it, at the far left there is a support for knives of a light brown color and with different types of knives which I use just when I don't have other clean ones.

At the right of the white stove it's almost nothing, but a grey metallic unplugged microwave. There is a painting on the left wall, above kitchens furniture with a flower on it, and on the same part of the kitchen and wall, the fridge.

The fridge it's almost empty on the inside, but full on the outside with countless glued small sheets, colored or white, that are notes, old ones or new ones.

The bathroom is as you enter in the apartment, at the right, and it is mostly green and white. The tile is white while the sandstone is a light green and there is a bath with a blue courtain, that is in front and at the left there is a white sink and a white toilet, above the sink there is an ordinary mirror but that can be opened and in its compartment there are mostly pills and the door is pretty much in the middle of the bathroom while at the left is just a towel bar on it and under it, there is the washing machine with different things on it.

The block is somehow empty for most of the time. I've always thought that these people have jobs and a busy life and all that I have is a place which I call home in which I live alone, all day and all night, trapped.

"I like this."

He said while he is staring at a framed photo from one bookshelf.

For the first time while I was in my house, I wondered why I feel so secretive. I used to feel like this place describes me but now that he looks everywhere, I think of all of the things that have their own stories and which I don't know if I could tell them. Not to mention my story.

"Wow!"

I was lost in my thoughts when he suddenly exclaimed from my bedroom in which I didn't observed that he entered.

'Quick boy.' I thought while I've realized that he must have opened the door slowly so I wouldn't hear him while smoking my cigarette and maybe I even seemed to think about something else.

'I took my eyes off of him just for a second.'

I ignored almost all that he said because he mostly made useless comments, more to himself, but I quickly ran to my own bedroom when he yelled.

He is now on the bed with Felix in his arms.

I just walked to my table and I thrown the now finished cigarette, and I immediately lit another one and just then I spoke to him:

"Why did you screamed if you're not scared of cats?"

I asked him in a monotone voice while I successfully lit another cigarette and I immediately begun to devour it.

"I was just surprised by it."

He said while he still rubs the cat and the cat answered with its purring.

"Hn." I said while I put the packet of cigarettes on the table when he had suddenly talked to me.

"What breed?"

"Chartreux." I've quickly answered after I inhaled again and sat on the other side of the bed while I still stare in front of me, at the transparent closed door or mostly after it, on the balcony, in the night.

"What?"

He asked somehow amused while I could hear the smile when he said the simple word.

I've smirked myself, because I didn't expect him to know it, anyway.

"Chartreux is the name of the breed, it's French."

The entirely black cat has mewed in response, and Naruto seemed to be even more entertained by the smart cat.

"What's her name?"

"Felix." I said while I got up from the bed and almost got out of the room while he walked after me with the cat in his hands.

"But you know that it's a female not a male."

He said a little ironically, as a fact, but almost putting a question.

"Yeah, I know." I answered and I sigh while I sat on the couch while I still look at him.

"Then why did you called her Felix?"

He asked me, and I quickly closed and opened my eyes at the memory.

"I …didn't know it was a female so I called her Felix and I got used to it and then she got used to it so it remained to be Felix."

"Hm…"

He said while moving through the room with the cat still in his hands.

The memory is vague but it quickly came back to me like a movie with sad ending, a movie that cannot be forgotten just because you made that movie, you have been part of it, but it didn't meant that you enjoyed it, even if I did, back then…

"So…"

He began to say while he still walks through the apartment, left and right until he sat down beside me.

"I can pretty much figure out that this couch is my bed, but you will at least give one blanket, no?"

I almost forgot that it's still night and that we must sleep. When I answered him with an affirmative answer some hours ago, I didn't think where he will sleep or things like that. All I knew was that I wanted something new in my life and it seemed that I just did it; I just received the opportunity of a change.

'Even if I am not the spontaneous type, not at all…'

"A blanket comes."

I said as I got up and walked to my bedroom, to the closet and I took out a blanket and one white sheet and then to my bed and I took one pillow from the two that are, then walked back to the living room, but he was gone.

'Why you…"

I've put the things on the couch and right then, I heard something that came from the kitchen.

When I walked in, he was with his head in the fridge. I sat myself against the wall behind him and with my hands at my chest, and I made a small coughing sound to get his attention.

He hit his head to one of the shelf that was above his head of the fridge and then he immediately begun to massage the hurt spot while he turned around and looked at me with a small smile. Felix has ran away from his arms after he hit his head.

"I was… I just…"

I don't think he steals food or even if he was, he has nothing to steal from me. In the fridge there is just a bottle of milk and one with water, and some eggs in a small compartment.

"Hn." I quickly said and I walked to the living room, as I thought, he followed me and he stared at me while I arranged the white sheet on the couch and then I've put the pillow against the arm of the couch while I took the other pillows that would've been uncomfortable to sleep with, and I put them on my bed, then I took one pair pajamas from my closet and I gave it to him.

"Um..." He said and I've quickly spoke while I suppressed all of the words that he was about to say.

"The bathroom is there and yes, you can make a shower."

I said while I pointed to the white door with my finger, and he just smiled and quickly walked to it, and closed the door behind him.

I spread the blanket on the couch and I sat down on it while I stared at the cat that sits in front of me on its butt, and looks at me and just then, I heard the sound of the shower, but the cat seems uninterested by it.

"Do you seriously like him?"

Felix liked just three persons from all of the people that I've brought home.

'Not that I know many people, nor did I brought that certain person again after she scratched that person until she or he had left.'

The first one is me, and if she would be a human, I could tell that she disagrees with the way I live, but she managed to get used to the way I live and she even begun to love me for what I am, at least that is what I see.

The second one is my only friend that is a woman with which I go to the theater every Friday. She comes to my house before that, and Felix has always taken her side, when she constantly tells me about the messy kitchen, and when I lost weight and all the things she can find.

She often brings food with her and tells me to eat it or that she will kill me.

'Such a funny odd woman.' I thought while I smirked, but then my smile disappeared while I thought at the third person.

'She liked him the most; after all, he bought her for me and he is …'

I erased my thought while I closed my eyes and in the same time, the sound of the running water in the bathroom has stopped, and I just looked at my right, at the bathroom door, waiting and pretending to wait, while I ignored my thoughts, and the scar that has just opened in my chest while the door didn't opened, I felt something at my feet and just then I saw Felix with one paw on my right leg, staring at me.

She jumped in my lap, and I immediately petted her, while after some seconds the door finally opened.

It revealed an ordinary person if you could name him that just once. In my blue pajamas with a little wet hair, blond , that still stays in every direction.

With his clothes in his hands, and in bare feet, he walked to me and I can read him easily, and just when I thought that he has something to say, he spoke.

"Um… I know that maybe I am a drag but I just wanted to thank you for letting me stay here, and for all this, I understand if you will kick me out tomorrow or something but I just…"

I stood up, and I've put one hand on the pockets of my jeans at my back and I've realized that I let the packet of cigarette on the table and I just sigh.

'How I need one right now…' I thought and then looked at the confused boy before me. I know nothing about him and I doubt that he will tell me if I ask him, at least not before he will trust me, not that I will tell him something about me even if I will trust him, but still…

'What was in my head? '

I know that maybe I am crazy that I just picked someone up from a park and to let him stay with me, is more than crazy, but with my empty life, there is nothing to lose so I just begun to talk even if I find this extremely annoying.

The words of encouragement, not him.

"Who said that I will kick you out tomorrow?"

I asked and I immediately begun to miss my cigarettes, but thought that if I walk out right now he will think I run away or something.

"Well, no one, but …"

He said and he stared at the ground, after, he seemed to have finished his sentence with nothing left to say.

"Let's be clear 'cause I will say this just once…"

I said but then, I immediately walked away.

'Damn.' I thought while I stared at his innocent face. I walked to my bedroom, I took the packet of cigarettes, I took one, I lit it and I felt good again, while I looked at the room and I've realized he does not know what I am doing, and just stays there, confused.

I got back and I could tell he just now realizes and he just stares at me with no particularly expression on his face.

Not even sad, nothing, just content, that whatever will come, will just come and that's it.

"I didn't took you from there just so that I will kick you out after two days, if you think that then you think wrong. But I won't force you to stay here either, and if you don't like my way of living then you know where the door is."

I said in a rush and then I tasted my cigarette again, while Felix just sat herself in front of Naruto, with her chest up like protecting him.

'Don't tell me that you now take his side too, that woman and now him.' I thought but I said nothing, and instead, I took my eyes off Felix and I looked at a now, confused boy.

"I...I have no expectations... and I…don't…" He said but almost stopped after every word. He has put the free hand on his head in frustration and then he begun to talk again.

"I am not pretentious or anything, I am really grateful, it's just that you don't find someone that takes you in their home very often."

'So, I am not the first one who has took you from the street? And they kicked you out after…?'

"I imagine." I said while I made a step to my door and then looked at him.

I know that this conversation is complicated and now, overdone, we both want to ask questions, but we don't trust each other for a honest answer.

He is a runaway and I am a mad person that takes people of the streets, we can't do this right now.

"Goodnight."

I said and he quickly responded right after he heard me, and he looked up from the wooden floor, and said quickly:

"Goodnight."

I opened my door and after some seconds, Felix was in the room before me and before I could even close the door, and right after I closed it, she was already on the bed, looking at me.

I turned off the light and sat on the bed, under the blanket. The only light was coming from outside, from the still full moon, it is almost four in the morning and the night isn't so dense now, but it is still night.

I raised my head from the pillow when I realized that I am still in my outside clothes, but didn't rose up from the comfortable bed.

Instead, I took the package from the pockets of my jeans and lit one while I stared at Felix that stared back at me.

"Do you think I was too harsh?"

I asked Felix, that has not moved at all and I wondered if I asked in a low enough voice, so that he wouldn't have heard me.

'Someone else is in this house.' I thought while a smirk appeared on my face while the cigarette burned the blanket fabric a little because of the ash that has fallen on it.

There are ashtrays everywhere in the house so no matter where I am, I always have one, but there are everywhere but not in the bed.

'On the table…' I thought while looking at my right to the table and I decided that I am too tired to move until there. Instead, I kept staring at Felix that has moved her position, and I can only see her side, while she looks in front of her, at the closed door.

'What's your family name? Do you even have a family? What age are you? Where have you been before? How did you live until now? Why were you on that bank? Why do you now try not to call me old man, like you owe me something? And why, why do you look at me with those eyes?'

I asked these questions in my head while I too, stare at the door, along with Felix. I stretched a little and I put the cigarette in the ashtray and the packet on the table, and then I've put myself to sleep.

The events of today becoming just a blur in my mind while the darkness of the sleep embraced me with its warmth, promising that the morning, this warmth, will be more painful and uncomfortable, as always.  
>To be continued…<p>

Yeah, sorry it is out with a few hours later. I had…problems with my computer. And this is the cat ' .org/wiki/Chartreux ' it really exists and it has its own personality in this story and yes everybody has a past, even the cat.

Oh, and skyglazingMaro, thank you for your comment, I am glad you liked it and thank you for telling me.

See you guys next Friday, Saturday or Sunday.


	3. Chapter 3:Resistance

AN: Blauherz, I couldn't respond to your review, so I will respond here. In the chapter 2, I have put a new AN at the begining of it, for those who might think the same as you, and I too, think that I might have annoyed some of my readers, I didn't enjoyed to write it very much as I enjoy describing feelings or thoughts, but I had to write it, it was necessary and I promise to don't describe as much as there, it was the only chapter with that much describing for a place, and I too think that it's okay to write just so you can imagine the rest, if you read the AN from chapter 2, it is described almost the same as in here but for the ones that will read it then. Thank you for your patience and that you continued to read even if you annoyed you a little and I really appreciate how honest you were in your review and I thank you from the bottom of my heart because you've told me.

And I am sorry if I've annoyed someone, I didn't want to, and I hope that won't stop you from reading my next chapters, I promise to be back to the language and at the descriptions that I had in chapter 1 which is how I like to write and how I want this story to be.

With the softness of a poem, like describing of an open red rose, and the story of a man that hates the world so much but in the same time, finds the beauty of it everywhere.

So, now, enjoy the chapter:

Standing on my bed, looking at the window, at the pouring rain that threatens that she won't stop until the late afternoon or maybe until tonight. The inspiration has hit my mind, with a poem and I quickly took a white sheet from the table and a pen and I begun to write, even if I stopped at the beginning of each verse, but in the end, this is all that I could write:

As the sky that cries on my dirty windows,

As the red balloon lost from a carnival

Leaded by the wind until it will burst, until…

It will arrive exactly …nowhere.

Chapter 3: Resistance

The silence of the morning, the sun hasn't made its appearance yet and the night seems to bat its eyelashes at the short but cold breezes, and at the dew that sat on the fresh grass but has been washed away by the tears of the clouded sky.

I watched and listened to the only sound that could be heard, the drops of tears on my balcony, the breeze that yells outside and seems angry every time it hit my window and my door.

I watched and I listened but surely, it all became just a picture, a moment blocked in time, and I was the only one alive, slowly, it all became just a background sound, while the principal actor were my own thoughts, this colorless scene was even more dramatic when my thoughts entered in the scene but even if in my head, everything moved, on black and white, everything was alive in a moment, even so, my body in the cruel reality didn't moved.

The scene was like a picture, in enough time, nothing seemed to move but as always, the power of anger, the electricity has divided the sky in two before of my two black eyes.

The sound of the anger that has swallowed the sound of the sky that it's still crying, like someone that begins to shout when someone cries, like a child, a poor, sad and blameless child that is crying, and an angry mother that has begun to hit him, suddenly yells and blames him.

Like the rain and the thunder.

But even if I watched and listened to the scene, I still have not moved an inch. It was a scene so well known for me that it seemed uninteresting and I watched and listened without pity in my soul.

I was the father that has watched the scene, but hasn't moved one finger to help, nor the child or the mother. I don't take sides, so I didn't help any of them.

Because I am the one that is a stranger, but still, someone that is in the middle of all this. My sorrow was too deep, I am on the bottom of the ocean but on the ocean's surface, the destructive storm waits and begs for my attention.

But I am too down, my ears are deaf from the morbid atmosphere that had covered my ears, my body numb from the heavy water, and my mouth covered, lips glued and even if I would dare to unglue them, nobody would hear me.

'From the bottom of the ocean.'

I thought and just then, I moved, I rose up from my bed and I pulled the blinds for the window and from the door. I could still hear but I couldn't see and so, I ignored the sounds, it became one with the silence.

I lit one cigarette and then I got out of my room with it between my lips.

The living room is the same, in its own silence, in its own cries. But for the first time, when I looked at my right, I saw a living form, which was a sleeping young boy.

His body it's stretched on the couch, one hand falling off the edge of the couch and the other one on its stomach, where the fabric couldn't cover, the shirt is a little more up from the constant moving that he has done while sleeping, while one of his leg almost touches the ground and the other one the wall, with the help of the couch. Blond hair is disorderly, along with his clothes.

While I walked nearer, I could almost swear that he is salivating, but for a reason that I don't know, nothing surprises me. It annoyed me, the behavior he had earlier, he played for me when I already know his real behavior. The one he had in the park.

"_Hello old man."_

_I've quickly looked at my left, at a bank that it's not empty but changed, with a boy sitting on it, in a quite rude posture, as if sleeping there but not looking like a beggar either._

"_Hn."'_

The memory passed through my eyes like a headlight of a car while I watched the road, it came so quickly and it passed the same.

But I remained in reality while I watched his face, the rebel blond hair and the closed eyes.

I put the cigarette between my lips again and let it there while with my right hand I begun to slowly pull down the shirt that was up, but I was surprised and my eyes opened wider, as if the thunder has spreaded and exploded on the sky again, but no.

He caught my hand with his and then he has turned himself on his right side, still holding onto my hand as if he is holding a teddy bear to his chest.

'He doesn't realize.' I thought quickly while I closed my eyes for a second.

I tried to retreat my hand, but at first, he didn't allowed me, but the second time I tried while holding onto his hand, and I tried to retreat the other trapped hand, I succeed but didn't, 'cause he caught the hand with which I tried to free the other one.

I stared at him while I couldn't believe he behaves like this even when he is asleep.

'What was in my head?'

I continued to stare at him while he made a sound which I couldn't identify as anything else than a groan of an man asleep, but still…

'How tired are you?'

I stared at our hands without any real motive, my mind blank and my cigarette continued to burn on its own while I asked nothing from it.

"Sasuke?"

I've quickly looked up at him but I remained the same. But he is with sleepy and confused blue eyes staring back at me.

We both know our positions, and there is nothing to be embarrassed about but I am sure I will soon become a little because without reason, we continue to stare at each other's eyes and none of us will move.

"Good morning."

I said and I've realized that I could hear the water drops on the window of the living room too. I could hear the rain but there was no thunder, just the child that it's still crying.

He stared at me and he closed its eyes as if trying to come back to reality and then he spoke in a low sleepy voice:

"Morning."

He said and then he has finally freed my hand from its tight hold, and I took it back, not too quickly but also, not too slowly.

I walked to the kitchen quite quickly and I put the cigarette in the ashtray and then, I put both of my hands on the kitchen's counter and I leaned on it while I closed my eyes.

'What am I doing?'

I asked myself and I've stood like this until I heard in the kitchen the sound of someone stretching and then, slow footsteps on the parquet.

And soon enough, a low voice, his voice.

"Are you okay, old man?"

He asked me and without my will, I snapped my eyes open and turned around but stared at him with no expression on my face.

'Back to your old self, huh?' I've thought in my head somehow relieved that I didn't have to meet with that annoying boy that has been yesterday in my living room.

The boy who was grateful to me was more than a stranger, more than the stranger that he is already to me. I don't know how to react to someone like that. I don't know how to react to this behavior that he has now, but at least; there are no nice words, there are no bowed heads and there is no gratefulness.

'I don't deserve any of that.' I thought and then, I spoke outside, in the outside world, when I finally met his confused gaze:

"I am fine, did you slept well?"

I asked him and he seemed to be took a little aback by my question, at least a little.

"Yeah…I … Humph…"

I could tell that he wanted to ask me, tell me something but he stopped himself. And instead, he massaged the back of his head and smiled a smile that I could recognize as one of the smiles that I've done myself. Not often but I know it well.

A smile that is full with sorrow in it, a beautiful smile that it's showed just when you remember of the past times, sad or happy times. What it's wrong about this smile is that the pain that it is in it, matches the beauty of it, altogether.

You can't really tell about the rain that it is ugly or about a flower, even if the rain is so powerful and cold sometimes, that destroys or that the flower it's wilted, but both of them, are still beautiful, like this smile that might have so much pain in it but makes the one that wears it, mysterious, somehow innocent and above them all, beautiful.

A small laugh and then, returning to normal, his face but not his eyes that are still carrying the same emotion like the smile that has been on his face just with two seconds ago, he has put his hands beside his body and he waits for me to speak, to save him.

"You sure there's nothing wrong with you, old man?"

He asked me, as if he is really sure of what he is saying.

"No, why ask?"

I've begun to be very curious about his sudden change of expression and tone of voice.

"You're pale…"

He spoke to me in a low voice but high enough for me to hear him, he said it while he looked at the ground and then at me, waiting.

"I am fine." I said and then begun to search through drawers. I could tell that he still looks at me and that he didn't move an inch.

"Are you hungry?"

I asked him and I immediately thought that it was a stupid question.

'Of course that he is hungry, he is a little too skinny anyway and I found him in a park after all…'

I've stopped my searching and I looked at him, he is looking back at me while a small smile appeared on his face like he is a little embarrassed.

"A little…"

"Well then I have some bad news, all that it's in this apartment, it's black coffee."

I said while I realized that for me, that won't be a problem but for someone that waits to be taken care of at least a little, after being 'saved' might be a problem.

"It's okay."

I didn't realize that I was looking at the ground just until I rose up my eyes from it, to look at him, while he is looking at me.

'It might be okay for you to live like me just because you try to don't care, but I still am a bad host.'

I've thought quickly, but I still look at him with no real expression on my face.

"Hn."

I took the kettle from its place, from a cabinet and I filled it with water and then with the help of the stove, let the water to boil above it.

Just then, I opened the same cabinet and I took a packet of black coffee.

I stood there, staring at the water and then at my feet, where Felix seems to demand its food.

I gave the cat its own food, the only food from the whole apartment that it's always present; the cat has no fault of my way of living after all.

Just after this, while I caressed Felix on its head while she eats, I looked from my position to him, he still looks at me.

He leans against the wall with his blue eyes at me.

'If only I could know at what he is thinking about right now.'

I got back to the kettle,I've put some coffee, I've took out two cups and then I turned around just then I looked at him and I spoke:

"We will go out to eat a little later, can you resist until then?"

I asked and a smile appeared on his face. A small ironic smile and I've quickly thought: 'Of course you'll resist, you're used to be hungry.'

"Yeah, I think I'll survive." He said with the same smile on his lips.

I poured the coffee in the cups and I gave one to him while I put my cup on the desk, and then I walked back to my room, I took my laptop and then I came back to my desk, I sat down, I've even took a sip from my coffee and then as if awoken up from my usually routine, I looked behind me, at the couch where he is with his legs crossed on the couch's surface, in an w position and with his both hands on the white cup, drinking slowly while looking at me.

I could tell what his eyes want to narrate for me.

He understands that this is my routine, that this is all I do, he understands and I wonder if he will let it like this, or if he will try to change it.

'I wonder which one I want to happen.' I've thought and then I turned back to my laptop.

I begin to write because the deadline it's very close, but I almost wrote nothing.

The story is about a poor boy in a poor village. It's almost without plot, it writes on its own but I almost don't care about it because I don't think anyone will judge me for it. I have people that read my books but my books are just without importance to me because I still wait, I wait for my inspiration, for the book of my life, for a book of which I would be proud to call it as mine.

'But I think this waiting will last more than I could estimate.'

I write, I let my fingers to guide me and my mind to create the story after every word which I quickly write with the help of my keyboard, I let it be leaded by the wind, by my fingers like painting a painting that has no real imagine.

A brush that is leaded by the human hand, a brush moving on the sheet with different colors but it just paints, it really just paints, because in the end, it is made by me but it doesn't defines me, it just is, the colors I use just show in what state I am in, what color my thoughts and life have, and as most of my critics have said, I use just black, grey, a dark red, a dark violet and a dirty white. All of my colors are dark but even the dark red can look bright when you use darker colors around it. This is what I do.

"What are you writing?"

He suddenly asked me and even if I was absorbed by my thoughts and of my fingertips story, I heard him clear and I could tell that he is still on the couch, in the same position even if more than half an hour has passed.

"A story."

I told him and begun to write again.

"About what?"

I stopped and I turned around to look at him.

"It's not really that interesting."

He looked at me and then at the ground but he begun he talk to me with a different tone:

"How can you say about your own story that it's not interesting?" He has asked me, while still looking at the ground and just when he finished he looked at me, and just then, I responded with the same smile that he wore in the kitchen.

"Because it's not."

He looked at me with even more wide eyes and an even more hurt expression and I could tell that he doesn't agrees with me even if he hadn't read a single word of this story or any of my stories.

"Then...how…" He stopped because he wanted to explain something but changed his mind, and then he looked at me very attentive and retook his idea.

"It's your story, if you don't like it, then why you write it?" He said almost yelling at me and just then it all begun to move in me, the mechanism, and the blood that I have stopped for a long time now. I stopped it because I had no choice but to stop it, not because I wanted.

'Yeah, he's right, but since when I become like this? Since when do I write something just because I have to write it, not because I want to write it? Since when the whole world has taken control of my own stories and not me, controlling them, when I am the one that writes them?'

I've always wanted to be a writer, because I wanted to tell a story that I could find myself into, a story that others might find themselves into. A story that has all of the words that I know in it, all my memories, and my entire heart.

It was easy to don't let it settle within me, this reality, because it seems that my books have sold, that they like what I write but the only one that doesn't likes what I writes, is the one that wrote them itself, me.

"I write it, so I can have fans before I will write a book that I will write which I will like too."

Indeed, this is not a lie at all, this was my plan for the beginning but after so much time, I forgot.

"But, why do you still continue to write something you don't like and why don't you try to write something that you will like?"

He said but somehow lost in his own words.

I thought twice about what he said and after that, I answered:

"It's not that simple… I have to find a good story and… I don't know but it's really not that simple."

"Of course it is." He said so quickly and so confident that I immediately looked at him.

"You just have to live, but not like this, you have to walk outside and find your story, and after all, you have to write about you, not about anybody else, invent some characters you want, and then make them like you, make them yours, just fucking…at least try living a little for Christ's sake!"

I looked at him as he spoke quickly but sincere, he just stared at me this entire time, in my eyes, waiting for me to move an inch and all that I did was to smile for myself.

'You have no idea what you're talking about but you seem to be so sure of yourself.'

"I tried but …I couldn't."

I said with the same small smile on my face.

"And you don't even eat and you go out just when it's night?"

He said, accusing me for the way that I live.

After all, he is not the only one that did this, he is not the only one that blames me but for the first time, I feel like he is right, that I won't do anything if I will continue to live like this, me with myself, me and with my fake books, and me with my old memories that haunt me every day, this is the result after all.

A house without food, a house without humans, a house with photos of anything but someone, a house with an owner that has a cat, a owner that never makes noise, a owner that walks out just when it's too late, at night , an owner that writes books that he himself, thinks they are no good and the ones that read even one like them, love them so much and think that the next one is more good than the last one, but when I go to receive prizes, I listen to people that talk about the respective book and they are talking about the feelings that the book offers, not just about the story, about certain feelings and I'm just looking at them, numb, and I stare and I listen to those lies, while I think just one single thought every time, one single line:

'I didn't felt anything when I wrote it.'

And then I go on that stage, and I talk and I lie and then I say thank you and then I go back to my apartment, back to my cage, and I begin to write lies again until I will be sure everybody has believed in my lies and I am sure of that when everybody praises my books and gives me prizes for my lies.

"I know you're right but it's too late."

I said sure of myself and I've finally turned around and I begun to write again. After some minutes, he spoke again:

"It's never too late, old man."

He said and I stopped typing while I didn't turned around to look at him, but I heard his smile in his voice.

"Hello! Anybody home?"

I heard someone yelling at my door and I swear that I could recognize that voice anywhere.

I sigh and I got up from my chair while I saw his confused face but I ignored it and walked to the door.

"Come on! Open the door or I will really break it this time!"

She yelled again and just when I thought that the knocks will get too loud. I opened it.

"Stop yelling Celine, you're disturbing the whole block." I said while looking at the incredible active woman that it's even older than I am.

"Sorry, sorry, but I've thought that you'll let me at the door again."

She entered even before she has even finished the whole sentence.

I closed the door and just then I realized that she doesn't know about Naruto.

"Oh, you have a guest? This sure is new."

She said while she walked closer to him with a smile on her face and she has stretched her hand to him in a professionally way but in a very friendly way too, something that I could count as one of her gifts.

She is very ambitions, full with energy, positive but realistic, very serious when she wants to be and extremely clever, too clever and sharp, like a sly fox.

She always gets what she wants, sadly, even from me.

Naruto shyly took her hand but smiled too. I could tell she examines him now from head to toe.

"I am Celine Mayer and I am an editor, what's your name dear?"

"Naruto." He said and smiled.

'No family name again, huh?'

I stood there looking at the scene with my hands crossed at my chest, waiting for it to end or at least to observe me.

"So, you are coming with us at the theater, no?"

She asked him while still holding onto his hand and she even bowed closer to him like a predator bowing over its prey.

'Cunning woman, I even forgot that today it's Friday, again.' I thought and then I sigh and just when I opened my eyes, I realized that he looks at me, waiting for me to say something.

My eyes opened wider with realization.

'You won't do anything that I don't want you to?'

"Of course he will go with us Celine, why do you ask?"

She looked at me too, but this time her expression changed, from the sly expression which she had earlier, now she seems worried.

She let go of his hand and he didn't looked at me anymore, and just a smile has appeared on his face while he looks at her.

She looked at him with an expression that I hate.

'You realized what has happened here, didn't you?' I thought sad in my mind while looking at the woman standing before the couch with, a sad expression on her face, looking a boy that stays on the couch, cross-legged, with a wide smile on his face.

"We need to talk, Sasuke, now."

She said while she is still looking at him and I didn't know what to think. The voice she used was like she just talked from a tomb.

We quickly walked to the kitchen while I've put him to change in the bathroom with some clothes of mine that were more normal than the ones he has, the only ones he has.

She leaned wagainst one of the counter with her back that was close to the door and I stood on the other side, close to the fridge, she has put her hands crossed at her chest while wearing a little angry but worried look on her face, starring directly at me.

I looked back but with my both hands on the counter, expecting the storm to pour, and I am sure I will feel this one; she always makes sure of it.

"What is this boy?"

She begun, I could sense that I have to tell her the truth because she knows when I lie and of course, there is no normal way to explain the situation.

"A boy…" I said innocently.

"Don't play with me, why did he slept here?"

I could tell that if I told her that he has just slept at me, it would be futile, just because she will come here the next Friday and I don't think he will leave until then.

"It's a long story."

"I have time to listen to it."

She waits for my explanation and just now, I give it to her.

"He will live with me from now on."

I said and she seemed even more confused and worried than before. But she just closed her eyes to open them again and said in a low voice:

"Why?"

I sigh and I said:

"Because he has nowhere else to go to."

"What do you mean?"

She quickly asked me and I suddenly felt that I just made a step closer to my own grave.

"He ran away from, I don't know, home or something, I found him in a park and I brought him here and decided to let him stay with me at least until he will be able to live somewhere else."

Her anger wasn't present anymore but her worried expression was even more present than before.

"You let a stranger to live with you? You took him from the street? What?"

She said almost yelling and gesticulating with her hands and just then I spoke:

"I know what you are saying; I know it seems insane but he is not a criminal or something. Believe me…"

I begun to say but she has cut me off.

"I want to believe you but you're not sure of it! Where has he lived before? How old is he anyway? He looks too young..."

I knew where she wanted to knock 'cause I wanted to ask those questions myself, but I've let them slide, for a reason that I don't know myself, I just didn't asked him, I just felt like he will tell me when he will want to even if he seemed to have no intention to do it.

I've realized that when he was almost to tell me something about himself this morning, in the kitchen, when he made that smile but not word got out of his mouth.

"I don't know."

I said this and I just looked at her without any expression while she put her hand to her temples and start massaging them while she has spoke again.

"This it's not like you at all, I never thought you will ever do something like this, I know you from when you were young and you don't let me completely in your life not even now, and suddenly you picked up someone from some park."

She said in a calm voice, more like talking to herself than like talking to me, explaining me the situation she is going through, but to she explained it for herself too.

"I know it seems mad but just give him a chance."

I don't even know him for 24 hours but I already take his side. I think he must've thrown a spell on me or something but even if I don't know anything about him besides his name, I feel like I can trust him.

'Such a blind trust.'

Just after thinking this I looked at her and with her hands at her temples but she stopped massaging them and her eyes are not closed anymore but opened. She stares at me and just when she opened her mouth to say something, someone else talked and we both looked at the direction from where the voice was.

"Um, is everything okay?"

He is now dressed in my cloths, a white shirt and blue normal jeans. But his hair is still in every way and he still has a rebel side that can't be covered even with these cloths.

With his hands in his pockets and with a confused but somehow guilty expression he stared at both of us.

"Yes, everything is okay." I said, trying to convince Celine to play with my cards.

And as expected, she did.

"You look very good in these cloths."

She said and a smile has appeared on her face again, the earlier expression disappearing into air.

"Thank you." He said and smiled.

"Well then, let's go." I said quickly, avoiding the sudden silence.

While we walked outside of the apartment and I closed the door with the key, I realized that Felix might be sleeping and I think of us as being fools.

I sigh and I begun to walk while thinking that this is just the beginning. Maybe I am the child that cries, the rain, and maybe Celine is the mother that yells, the thunder, but then what is he?

When we got out of the block I've immediately looked at the sun shines brightly above our heads, and then I looked at him, at him smiling.

'Maybe you are the sun.'

I thought and I smiled a little for myself too, while I continued to walk with them on the crowded street.

To be continued…


	4. Chapter 4:Irreplaceable

You can embrace me for one hundred times

You can be my ally at one thousand crimes,

But your feelings won't ever reach those of a saint

And the devil won't write any complaint.

You can hold my hand, but I won't feel a thing

You can let me win all the games which we will play, but I won't feel like a king,

And maybe I will cause you just disgust

But you can't replace the ghost that has made me stay in the dust.

Chapter 4: Irreplaceable

The old but beautiful theater has welcomed us with the sound of our own footsteps on the black-and-white tiles of the entrance, and with its modest wooden walls, but quite high and worked until the very last detail.

The ceiling is the most magnificent with its round structure. It's a really beloved piece of art, but it's limited here, at the entrance, but inside, where the scene is and where the people will sit on black and dark-red velvet chairs.

The way the scene was made isn't really very different from other theaters, but the wood was sure more expensive or more secure, or the quality of the huge curtains is more expensive, beautiful, and soft at the touch, or maybe we received more service from the theater than the actors themselves have received.

However, no matter the reason why this is almost the most beautiful and liked theater from this town it may not be because of the appearance of the theater, even if it's too big and very hospitably, but because, even if it's too big and very hospitably, but because of the ordinary people that are spectators, and because of the modest price and of the talented actors.

I am used to all this, so I do not stare at this theater with amazement in my eyes, like the eyes of my friend are right now.

'Friend?'

He, like any other man from this planet has been seduced by another friend of mine. That is a female, a sly and vicious female.

Even so, whatever the reason for which she won him with his tactics. She converted him to be by her side in these short hours that we spend together. I didn't commented at all, and for a reason that I don't know, I don't feel very good.

This was once a place in which I felt about like home, because after all, this place holds many dear memories for me.  
>Even so, without doubt I am being paranoid, but still, I don't want the history to repeat.<br>'If only my thoughts would stop.'

The tickets were bought some days ago by no other than my friend who has always been how they say, a regular but welcomed spectator of this theater.

After all, she brought me here too, but with years ago, and when I entered for the first time through those huge doors I was like him, assaulted by the beauty of this place, and I only wanted to see everything and to look everywhere. This until my eyes arrived on something else.

Until when my eyes have made peace with the theater and have decided that they didn't want to look anywhere else but there, at that person, and so it was.

'Why should I remember everything now?'

It isn't the fact that I feel like I am younger with too many years, and that I saw myself again while I looked at a blond young boy with blue eyes. I could see everything through his eyes.

'I wish I was blind.' I thought and I closed my eyes. The pain has spread through me from this thought alone.

"Dear, are you alright? You look pale..." Celine asked me with a worried voice, as always, but I refused to lose to her concerned eyes. I won't answer because I deserve to be silent, at times like this, I blame her.  
>We are here, in this theater where we are all actors, and we are all liars, but I am an amateur while he was the leading actor.<p>

I often feel good in here, and I eventually remember without even wanting to see everything through the eye of my mind, those memories. They don't affect me, or I try to pretend that they don't, and I go home just so I can scream a little...

Even so, today, I no longer remember it all in my clouded and miserable mind, no. I see it with my own two eyes before my eyes but through his eyes, and it hurts me.

For the first time, I feel like I can't resist until when I will arrive home to fall on my own dirty floor.

I want to blame her. I want to blame everybody that was in this theater that day. I wish I could blame someone else but myself.

I wish I had the luxury of being blind, of being more selfish than I already am, and I wish I could just be a spoiled brat that thinks that everybody is to blame but him.

I wish, but I already know the truth. I just want to blame someone else, but I am the only one to blame, my fault for believing...

When I am here, I exaggerate everything and when I am not in this theater everything seems better and every day is better, until Friday, because until then I'm left alone to wonder myself why I still come to this place that I despise, until Friday will arrive, and I will be in this theater again.

"It will start in any second, come on, old man!"

Naruto has talked to me, he took me by my arm and together, me with a pale and confused but with a blankly face and him, with a wide smile, and a smile that is directed to me and to me only.

We passed through the huge wooden doors of the theater, and we are welcomed with a nearly full room, and as always, all the seats will be filled until the play will start. Everybody will come in the last second or even in the middle of the play.

I was sat on my chair, and I looked at Celine that seems to enjoy herself while talking to the cheerful blond and also smiling, and I can tell that she still suspects him for something, and I don't even want to know what she thinks about all this.

He wears his smile badly beautifully, a wide but kindly smile. I think this is his only innocence, because every time he smiles, he is clear, a pure white.

Even so, nothing is completely white; after all, even if he is a pure and innocent white, even at the slightest touch, the white can turn black.  
>You can't expect everybody else to be as clean as you are. They are all dirty.<p>

A rebel brat who has run away from home and that has stood on the streets searching for something to eat or looking for some kind people, someone who will give him one finger, and then he will take the whole hand.

After all, I was that kind person that did it, or the stupid person. I feel so angry over no reason and my thoughts are the same.

Maybe the fact that I observed his small mistakes annoys me the most. The ability to move in two seconds, so slow that no one could sense him, even my cat is louder than him, and then, his head in my fridge, the patient but cold eyes, and I could tell, I just wait for him to show his true nature once and for all.

'I should stop right there. I confuse him with someone else. He is not like him. He can't be.'

For sure, I always analyzed everything at too much cold, when I am in this theater.

'I must get out a little.' I thought suddenly alarmed.

And just when I was about to go to the door or not, about to lift myself up from the chair, the curtain has been raised, and the room became darker, the audience along with myself began clapping their hands, and we can tell, mostly of the people had been here many times ago, I can even recognize one or two faces, and I don't usually look at others, but even for those that haven't been here before, like Naruto, applaud like the others.

'And I was so close...'

I thought and I sat down again. My lungs has immediately screamed for the need of a cigarette and all I could do as always was to encourage myself that the break isn't too far now that it started. On the other hand, it is even further now that it has just started, like three seconds ago.

Just when some man begun to talk on the stage, and he moved his hands artistically, my own hand who stays on the arms of the chair has been touched by no one than Naruto that seems to demand for my attention.

"What is it?"

I asked him in a whisper while bowing my head closer to him.

"You need to chill, old man."

He said like he has just commented on the weather but a small smile appeared on his lips while he said this and his smile could be also heard in his words.

"Why? I feel fine."

I said with no particularly exclamation. I told him the truth after all. The fact that my lungs are waiting for the break to come, even if the play has just started is just my normal problem, I hit with it every Friday in which I came, and somehow, beyond my capacity of understanding why my lungs are always merciful every Friday when I watch the play.

'I guess even my lungs became used to the pain.' I thought quietly while I realized that Naruto's expression is different. From his playful smirk to a sad expression or even blank, or both.

"You two, stop talking and be attentive!"  
>We both straighten our back at Celine's short but strong, even if just whispered words.<br>So, I watched and I listened.

"Oh, my friend, you have enough charm to make the dogs fall in love with you, but you have also enough charm to make the humans run!" One of the actors has said with its voice in a high amused tone.

The play is simple but still, it's hard to be focused, I even force myself to be attentive, to be in this room. It shouldn't be too hard after all, the plays were always about a lesson someone should learn in his life, it's interesting, but still…

'These plays are presented just for your eyes in this theater and they really teach you a lesson or two.' I thought while trying to encourage myself to be focused.

The story is even simpler, and it's really easy to understand.

At first, there was one beggar on the street, and that beggar, being old enough and wise enough to know what he wants, he sat himself on the ground but not in a park or in front of a church. No. He sat himself on the ground of the middle of the town. At his left there were many companies, just rich and spoiled people.

He thought that if he sat here then someone, eventually, will give him money, real money, after all, all that he wanted were some money so that he can eat and not to starve to death exactly in that place.

But he sat there for days and for his luck, the police ignored him, they didn't took him, but in the same time, he also had a dense bad luck.

If only the police would ignore him, then it would be just good for him. The rich and spoiled people that are walking besides him, and they are millions, well, they also completely ignore him.

They walked in front of him and behind him, with cell phones at their ears, and they don't even look at him, and if one of them has looked, they never looked twice.

He felt a little bad, he wanted to scream but then the police will hear too, and they wouldn't listen to him anyway, none of them, they feel like they are too important.

He has even begun to think seriously about moving his place, and maybe give up, but he was just too stubborn to move because of this. He refused to do it, even if he would starve to death.

But you see...he did not expect that everybody will begin to fill his dirty and torn pockets with money, no, but he did not expect that really not even one single person to don't stop or to just look at him twice, not to mention, to give him some pennies.

But he still waited and he waited and soon enough, he felt sad, melancholic and completely dejected.

And just when he was about to give up because of no other reason than the single reason, that he almost feels very sick, but just then, he has been seen. A voice has talked to him, but he couldn't see the face of the one that has talked with him.

So when he looked behind him, he saw an immense crowd with people, the ordinary rich deaf and blind people. But then he heard the voice again and he was ready to think that he has gone insane and that maybe God has decided that it was his time to change his world, from this hateful Earth that maybe he will go to heaven, after all, he did nothing wrong in his entire life.

He has also once been rich, but his mother died when she gave him birth, and when he was just fifteen years old, his father has died too, assassinated by other rich people that had killed him just out of jealousy but that wasn't enough for them, they even took all of his money, and they threw him on the streets, and they even told him that they should thank them, because he was still alive.

And even if his father was dead because of the rich people, he still didn't hate them. He didn't hate anyone at all. He thought that everybody that is human has a heart inside, that is beating and that feels.

Even if what he asks from these people is mercy, he thought that someone will show him a pair of warm eyes, but his faith now trembles because he has stood between 100000 rich humans each day, and they treated him like he was a dog and even more than that, a dead dog.

So he just closed his eyes and waited, waited for God to come and to take him far away, but instead he felt something on his right shoulder, and then he yelled, the part when the audience begun to laugh. This part, they have played it a little funny. Even so, Naruto has yelled too loud anyway.

The beggar looked at the man who was now beside him, on the ground too, but he didn't know what to think because it was just another beggar.

And so, it was almost the end of the play, and all that I wanted was to smoke and then, to see how it ends.

For the first time, the Gods listened to my wishes. When someone has announced a deserved break and the curtain has covered the scene for those minutes.

The first thing I wanted to do was as always to go outside and to smoke at the entrance and as always, Celine will go to the bathroom, for one thing or another.

But we've questioned each other with a mutual question, when we both looked at each other for a brief second.

"Naruto, do you need to go to the bathroom?" Celine asked Naruto and he seemed to still be in his little world or at least in the beggar's world, because he was the only one of us three that was still on his chair.

"Nope. I'm good." He said and Celine has walked away automatically, leaving me with him.

I sigh. And then I really thought that Celine still had her old tricks, and then, I just told him:

"Come with me."

I said and I walked immediately outside of the theater and also fast enough. Naruto would be sure thanking me if I would walk, a little slower but my lungs would kill me if I would do it.

I walked to one of the free public ashtrays from the entrance of the theater and I lit one a cigarette and while I was somehow in bliss I thought quickly:

'Finally, I can smoke!'

Even if for me, it was enough and the silence doesn't feel unpleasant at all, Naruto was having a hard time while deciding at what to look, at the huge old theater or at me, smoking as usual.

So he is now standing, leaning into the wall of the theater, and looks at me and after some seconds, he spoke:

"Why don't you smoke inside?"

"It's not allowed."

I answered and just then I realized something.

"It's your first time coming to a theater?"

I asked him and he quickly stopped looking at me. He has closed his eyes, and then he looked at the ground while talking to me.  
>"Yeah, so what? Anyway, you won't give me one of yours even if I ask you nicely, no?"<p>

I've realized that he has changed the subject with something that would really work, the cigarettes that I don't want him to smoke, but I am not so young to don't know what he does but I just pretend I didn't noticed and I continue his game.

'I won't force him to tell me if he doesn't want to.' I thought and just then I answered him.

"I won't give you one, even if you'll beg me. You're still underage."

I said really relaxed and he didn't stare at the ground anymore but at me, smiling.

'That can't be good.' I thought quickly while I met his gaze.

"If I begin to shout like crazy, you'll give me one, no?"

He said and I responded, with smoking a bit more in his face.

"You can shout all you want. They'll throw you somewhere, not me, and you will have to stay on the streets until the play will end because you don't even have a key."

I said rather calm and he didn't seem to enjoy my answer. His smile has quickly disappeared.

I finished one cigarette just to search for the next one.

We sat in silence for one minute or two, and then I realized that it all goes naturally.

The way we talk, the way we act around each other, and even the way we attack with our arguments.

'Too close.' I thought and I immediately sensed the fact that I might be pale again, I feel my face cold.

He looked at me with no special expression, and for a moment I hated the fact that no one will wear a smile. The silence and the twilight is all that is around us.

The beautiful colors of an ending, but in the same time, it's the start. It can be a good beginning or a bad one. Even so, it no longer matters which one it is.

'Too much.' I thought and I closed my eyes and when I opened them again, he was no longer looking at me but at the ground again, I thought that this is it, but then, I heard him talking to me once again:

"Did I do something wrong, old man?"

With my cigarette finished between my teeth, I've put it in the public ashtray before me that is at the entrance of the theater.

The last smoke just flew in the air as I crushed it with my fingers in the ashtray.

"No, you did nothing wrong."

He quickly stared intensely into my eyes but I refused to look into his eyes.

'After all, we are all actors here.' I thought and then I heard his voice again, talking to me:

"Then, what upset you?"

He asked me and without noticing me, he refused to look into my eyes, too. With a frown on his face, I looked at him wondering why he cares so much.

"No one."

I said and walked back in the theater with my hands in my pockets.

And I could hear him almost running behind me, and right before entering the big hall, in the mirror of the door, I could see him.

Behind me with almost the same frown but looking at me, wondering, searching.

'You're the same as him.' I thought quietly in my head.

We sat at our seats again and the curtain was shortly raised before our curious eyes once again.

The two beggars were still in the same place, in the same position and all the other people were there too. Oddly, or not, it looked like someone has just pressed pause for the play to start again.

So the beggar has sat beside him, on the ground, and they have begun to talk, to tell their stories, to talk about absolutely everything and shortly after, they became friends.

The new beggar brought him food to the older one, and when he brought bags with food, they ate it in whole days, and he stood with him and only with him, in all those days.

Even months have passed in this way; they have learned everything about each other.

And one day, like any other day, they made some jokes, and they laughed too loud this time. Nevertheless, they didn't care at all, so they continued to be happy and joyful, full with smiles and laughs.

And so, without even looking at the immense crowd around them anymore, they continued to tell jokes and stories.

But, what they didn't realized was that they are watched, a person has stopped and looked at them, another one also did this, and he even closed his mobile phone, and they just stared at the two friends, then another one came and then another one stopped.

After some time, it was just silence; the only sounds were their voices who still told jokes and stories.

When they realize, it was when even their mouths have stopped talking. They were wondering in their minds why everybody was looking at them.

But some woman thought that they won't talk anymore so she sat beside them on the ground and she told them to continue their story, because she was interesting for her it and that she thought it was really funny and after that, many people have said that they wanted to hear too, they raised their hand to show to the two friends that they also want to hear it.

Naruto raised his hand because he also wanted to hear it.  
>So all the rich people sat on the ground around the two beggars listening to them.<br>"So this is the end of the play. I hope you've all enjoyed it."

The room was again full with light and full with the energy that the spectators wanted to give to the actors on the stage, applauding with their hands enthusiastically.

The actors have bowed and have welcomed the kind words, and then we decided that it was time to go.

As always, because the play took some hours, outside it was already night, so Celine said that she is tired, and she took a taxi home after she embraced both of us too tight.

On our walk home, we began to talk on the almost empty streets with the lit street lamps above our heads and the gray pavement under our shoes.

"So, you liked it?" Naruto has asked me suddenly and I just answered him.

"Well, it depends, the narrator said that there are millions of people around them, but there were just what? Ten or less?" I said calm but with a cigarette between my teeth.

"How do you expect millions of people to fit on a small stage?" He said somehow ironically.

"Well, if you think about it, all the spectators made a nice number; we all have sat there in silence listening to their story." I said while looking at the sky.  
>"Yeah..." He said thoughtful and then he talked again to me:<p>

"I didn't think of that...but we weren't on the ground, we were on chairs." He said and smiled at me, proud with his new discovery.

"Well, I don't think any of the spectators were all that rich as how the story said those were, and there weren't beggars either so we are normal people, so we can stay on chairs." I said as a fact and I could hear a sound that I couldn't understand what it means, coming from Naruto's mouth again.

The sound stopped after some seconds and just our steeps could be heard on the grey pavement, we were shortly at the stairs of our block and soon enough, at the door of our apartment.

"We are home Felix!" Naruto almost yelled and I just stared at him and then at Felix that actually came at his call.

I decided that I shouldn't ask and I just walked to my room and I checked if there were any messages on my phone and without even realizing that I was expecting that as always there would be zero messages, I actually had one message.

The thing that I didn't like was that I didn't know whose number it is. And in the next second, I have thrown the phone on my bed.

What really surprised me was that I wasn't surprised when I saw Naruto on my bed, and I didn't even have heard him when he entered in my room. And I even closed my door.

I decided to ignore it and I walked to my closet and I've begun to put my jacket on a hanger.

While doing so, Naruto has begun to talk:

"Hey, old man..." He said almost calling for my attention, but I didn't said much:

"Hn."

"Do you believe in happy endings?" He said with a distant voice.

"Why do you ask?" I said while I started to fold some clothes.

"Well, I'm thinking at the play you know... It had a happy ending." He said with the same voice.

"Yeah, and?" I said, with my hands on the clothes.

"Do you think happy endings also happen in real life?" He said and just then, I turned around to look at him.

My eyes have met with his eyes. He really wants to know my answer, he's serious.

I sigh and then I thought about my answer.  
>'Well, it's been a long time from when I believed that a miracle can happen, and that I will have a happy ending. No, there are happy endings in real life.'<p>

I thought and I sigh again.

"Yes, but not always." I said.

'It's not really a one hundred percent lie.' I thought while I tried to be positive.

But then I looked at him again and he was sad, looking down again, this time, at the wooden floor.

When he raised his eyes from the floor, he smiled to me, and he showed me my own phone in his hand, stretching it towards me.

"You've got a message, old man."

He said still smiling, and while I made the three steps that had closed our distance, I took my phone.

Without even knowing why, I opened the message, and he still looks at me from my bed while I am standing with my phone in my hands, in front of the bed.

And I read the message in my mind:

'I know you miss me'

To be continued…

Sooooo, who do you think it is?


	5. Chapter 5:Wasted life

I am sorry for this late chapter, I know that I should have said something this week about why this chapter wasn't updated earlier but I wasn't home and where I have been, there was no computer…

So I couldn't even write it there, I just thought about it and when I came, that's today, I begun to write it and it's so late.

But I look forward to forgiveness and I bow my head for it and I will try harder to keep my promises.

But there was no way to write so, anyway, I will stop now and move on with the chapter.

From the previous chapter:

"Do you think happy endings also happen in real life?" He said and just then, I turned around to look at him.

My eyes have met with his eyes. He really wants to know my answer, he's serious.

I sigh and then I thought about my answer.  
>'Well, it's been a long time from when I believed that a miracle can happen, and that I will have a happy ending. No, there are no happy endings in real life.'<p>

I thought and I sigh again.

"Yes, but not always." I said.

'It's not really a one hundred percent lie.' I thought while I tried to be positive.

But then I looked at him again and he was sad, looking down again, this time, at the wooden floor.

When he raised his eyes from the floor, he smiled to me, and he showed me my own phone in his hand, stretching it towards me.

"You've got a message, old man."

He said still smiling, and while I made the three steps that had closed our distance, I took my phone.

Without even knowing why, I opened the message, and he still looks at me from my bed while I am standing with my phone in my hands, in front of the bed.

And I read the message in my mind:

'I know you miss me'

Chapter 5: Wasted life

Words don't leave my clouded mind how they used to,

I am here, running blind and instead of running ahead,

I run back to seconds, minutes, hours, days and years…

When I used to know who I am, when I felt something.

I regret that I forgot myself, that I chose the easy way out,

I erased myself, from my own mind along with my memories,

The painful ones continued to haunt me every time I woke up

And the happy ones were too much to keep, 'cause they will never come back.

Shocked, maybe, surprised, maybe, but above them all, I was afraid. My past just came back in full force, and I am completely unable to stop it from crushing on me.

'This can't be happening to me.' I thought slowly but firm.

It is a fact, that when I feel helpless, when this merciless but familiar pain is spreading through me like a bomb that has exploded inside of me makes me unable to move, like an octopus that has put its tentacles around me so tight that it makes me unable to think clearly at a logical solution, and like a snake who has embraced my neck, it instantly makes me to realize that I'm unable to breathe.

"You're okay old man? You're pale…"

He said with a worried voice, when I looked at him, his smile has disappeared.

Even so, I was almost unable to see him, the tentacles around me, so tight, my breathing so hurried, searching for a glimpse of air, now that my brain is also unable to think, not anymore.

'My chest hurts…' The last thought which I've left to escape in my mind after the pain has spread completely within me, like pure poison.

I looked at the phone, and I erased the message. I took the phone with me while I opened the closet, and I have thrown it on some random pile of clothes. I've begun to search for my only escape, now.

Because it's over.

"What are you doing?" I heard him, asking me but I did not respond.

I already regret it. The same old guilt is rising within me, but I deserve it.

I hate myself because in one second, after such a long time. This one message made me hope again. In one second after years of trying to kill my hopes, after all, all I did in the end was to let myself hope again.

After searching and searching again for the key that has unlocked the compartment that's inside my closet, I opened it, and I took it. I opened the bottle, and half of the liquid has already begun to burn the insides of my neck.

"What the hell? Stop!"

His hand on my bottle, and his worried, confused but angry face faced with mine. But I don't know how I look.

"Take your hands off!"

I yelled and he immediately stepped back for one second 'cause after two seconds, he yelled back:

"What the hell is wrong with you? What the hell wrote in that message? Why did you start drinking suddenly like you're crazy? Answer me for Christ's sake!"

I heard his outburst, but my mind and body are numb, he is swearing again, I almost didn't heard him, the message was clear in my head, but it doesn't hurt, not enough, but it's clear.

'I don't care anymore.'

Slowly but surely, the thought has moved through my now, clouded brain.

"Give the bottle to me." He said calm but in the same time, he seemed to try very hard to restrain another outburst.

I looked at him, at his stretched hand, and I walked away, out of the room, but I could still hear his voice even when I was close to the entrance's door.

"Come back!"

No matter what he said after that, his voice was too far to hear it. I was already on the street so quick that I hardly realized, and it seemed like the clouds were gathering before my eyes, and above my head.

'Why am I doing this again?'

…..

I stared at the closed door; I just looked at the door because my legs cannot be moved. I can't remember the last time I felt so confused. I can't remember the last time when something has made me feel in this horrible way, that I can't move and all that I can do it's to look at the closed door.

I didn't dare to close my eyes or to sigh, even if that is what I wanted to do, to calm down for at least a second, but instead, my lungs have screamed when I have begun to run outside, until I was on the street ,in front the block, but there was no one who looked like him.

Nevertheless, I continued to run to nowhere, right and left, forward and back, searching with my eyes, desperate.  
>'Where?' I asked in my mind but there was no answer until I saw black hair and pale skin.<p>

I immediately ran with all the energy that remained in me, and finally, I touched his shoulder.

"Sas…?"

I stared at a confused and unfamiliar face.

'It's not him! It's not him! It's not him…'

I thought loud, but I didn't say a word to the outside world, while I stood right in that place, now staring at a man who has walked away and that ignores me and then after one second, a stranger who has forgotten about my existence for eternity.

I am in the middle of an immense crowd of strangers, like mice, they move, run, breath, but they never look back.

'Why?'

I started to run again, and I entered in his apartment, again, and with my back against the entrance door, I tremble, and I put my hands in my blond hair, almost ripping it from its root, but I stopped when it has begun to hurt me.

But with my hands still on my head, in my hair, I put my head between my legs.

The floor is cold and hard, my head is spinning with questions, and I wish I could just pick one from the sea that has formed just from questions.

But I am too scared, and too far from being able to be selective.

'Why it's happening again?'

I asked myself after I stood in the same position for more than I could estimate.

I've felt something on my leg, and I've immediately looked up to see the cat that has been, also, left behind.

Even so, Felix didn't seem affected; she looked calm and seems to understand what it's happening to me.

Or at least, that is what I thought, when I looked into her calm eyes.

But just then, I wonder how the cat sees me, how desperate I might look, or how pathetic.

"And I swore that I won't ever be like this again."

I spoke out loud to Felix, that didn't move an inch. Instead, I picked her up, and I embraced her and she didn't resist, like she already knew that I needed someone to tell me that I am still on this earth, that I'm still able to breathe air, and that I can still change something.

But even my mind has begun to throw with red flags; my lungs had just stopped their pain, just to make space for a greater pain to settle down in my very core.

I've embraced the cat tighter than before, and I buried my head in its furry and in my legs in the same time, and within me, I hated myself for how weak I am and more, vulnerable again.

'How could I be abandoned for the third time?'

To be continued…

Short? The shortest? Yes. But this time, you can say that something begins to happen. And from the middle, it's from Naruto's point of view, yes, I really wanted to be just from one's point of view but I just couldn't think of a better way to do it, you mostly hear about each other's past just when you are in the other's point of view. I mean, now we are Naruto and we will learn about Sasuke.

That's it. Anyway, I think that there will be 5 chapters of one's point of view and then the next 5 of the other. It had been 5 of Sasuke, now it's Naruto's turn.

I really feel bad because I left it like that and that it turned out this short but I just felt like it should end like this. I had a writer's blockage, and no time, not to mention, I am emotionally …down. Just tell me your opinion 'cause it will make me feel better, I feel like I should encourage my readers to tell me their opinion, so I made a little suspense.

I didn't get a review for some time and it begins to upset me….

Well, anyway, until next time, thank you, for all of my readers that are still with me, if something bothers you (but not my grammatical or spelling mistakes 'cause I'm incurable) I will answer to any question with the best that I can and I will explain what can be explained.

Thank you.


	6. Chapter 6:Almost too perfect

I stare at my own house, like I stare at museum exhibits,  
>Someone strikes and knocks at my door, relentlessly<br>While the mirror is almost just cracks, while I broke a glass,  
>I colored them with my own red, photos and scratched furniture<br>But this house tells my story, and the ones who were here before me,  
>My walls thin, even with my voice low, ears listen bellow,<br>No secrets, no lies, this house is full with sheets and knives,  
>A cross on the wall and music playing too loud, while the objects can't talk<br>With a fake smile, I open the door. Someone comes in and sees nothing at all.

Chapter 6: Almost too perfect

The first rays of the shining sun have entered in the room, but no, I wasn't on the couch, and not because this house it's not really my house, but because I wasn't able to sleep, and because it felt wrong to be calm, on my couch or on his bed.

Instead, I restlessly tried to catch a glimpse of air in the kitchen, and my sleep has been forgotten by my mind, but that doesn't mean that my eyes and my body have also forgotten about it.

The only food which I could find in his kitchen was coffee, and for the first time in my life, I felt that the black substance was all that I needed to live.

Even if I would've found food, it would seem futile for the feelings that are trying to break me in two, right now.

While sitting on the cold sandstone of the kitchen with a cup of coffee in my hands, two words have crossed through my tired mind for endless times: 'Useless' and 'Worthless'.

"No." I spoke to the silence in which this apartment is drowned with, but if someone could listen to my thoughts, that someone could understand, I try to ignore and deny all the thoughts that are in my head, that have tried to get my attention for hours.

Nevertheless, there was no one in this house but the silence, me and the cat that was sleeping on his bed, but I could swear that Felix does not sleep, if the entrance door would open, she would be there in less than a second.

On the other hand, maybe, my mind wished that the entrance door to be opened, and that the action would prove that Felix is also awake like me. And that she does not sleep peacefully on his bed, even if the sign that she sleeps on his bed and nowhere else in the house might mean that she realizes the situation.

After all, the truth is that after I was literally and practically down, with my back against the door of the entrance with Felix in my hands, with some good hours ago, the first thing at which I could think about after I picked myself up from the floor like a smashed plate was to call Celine, of course, it also hasn't been an easy mission to complete.

I didn't know her cell phone number or anything about her more than her name, so I thought about the fact that Sasuke owns a cell phone with the cell phone numbers of his friends in it, and that it felt just impossible after how close they looked like together, that the phone wouldn't have Celine's number in it.

So after I called her once, and then I received nothing more than pure and insupportable silence, the second time that I called her, she answered.

I explained the whole situation in the best way possible; I tried to sound calm so she can actually understand what I was saying, at how desperate I felt in that moment because I almost spend my whole night looking for the cell phone in the entire house, which was in the end, in the closet.

I just had to sit down for one moment, and to look for the cell phone in my mind, like the last time when I saw a cell phone, but before I calmed down enough to sit down, or before I convince myself, that I won't find it if I won't try any other way, but before that, some time has passed…

She promised that she will search for him in all the places in which she thinks that he will be, and also, she said that this isn't the first time he did this, she said this in a whisper, but I suspect that she did not want me to hear the whisper.

When I asked her about it, she refused to answer me and to put more wood in the fire, that he will answer my questions if he will want to tell me.

So here I am, but what annoys me the most is that the amount of tiredness can't even compare with the amount of uneasiness and maybe, a small, tiny amount of worry.

My thoughts have been a bit positive for a second, like: that maybe I am just making a big deal out of nothing, after all, if I wouldn't be here, then I wouldn't know about this, and he has lived all alone for a long time before. And if this isn't the first time then he has survived the last time without me just fine.

But those thoughts looked like a lie, and sadly, I could not believe in them.

When I thought that maybe he has left because of me, I've seriously gone mad. However, when I told Celine about it, she swore that she thinks for one hundred percent that this isn't my fault.

When I asked her the reason, she said that she just knew.

In the same time, my thoughts have driven on roads from my mind, which I named 'forbidden' by me.

I don't really know anything about the old man, not at all, but the fact that he was gone in a second, and his house had become mine, the fact that I've been abandoned, and every place where he stood, and each coat with his smell, and every single tiny thing in this house had been used by him, touched by him, and maybe even bought by him…

It hurt, again, the same old stab in my chest.

'I hate when people leave.' I thought, and I put the half-full cup of coffee beside me, on the sandstone.

I already know how alive a house can look when the person that lives is in it. But for example, when the person is not in it, you can see the signs that someone has been here, like the ashtrays that are everywhere, the clothes which are still hanged on the wire, on his balcony, and everything else.

Those things are dead because no one will touch them again, the action has been made, but has not been finished, and what is worse is that someone might put his nose into those things and for sure, I will have another outburst of anger again.

'Like the last time…' I thought and closed my eyes.

'I have to think clear.' I've suggested this to myself, but it feels useless 'cause I just can't think clear.

'To think about what?' It is yet another thought that made me open my eyes.

If this isn't the first time he did this, but the second or even the third time. Then we are so alike but so different. This is the third time when I have been abandoned, and this is the third time when he has abandoned.

I've smiled to myself.

'That's my luck for always finding people that have a habit for leaving, but never have a habit for staying.'

My smile has faded as my thoughts, and as I got up from the floor, I walked through the house, and even before I could make one step in the bathroom, I checked the cell phone for the tenth time, that has been in my jeans from the moment when I called her and when she told me that if she finds him or something, she will call me, but I had no missed calls or messages.

"I hate being left in the dark!" I spoke to the mirror or to my own reflection.

The first time when this happened to me, I also spoke alone, and I thought that I've gone crazy. The second time when I did it again, I didn't even commented anymore and this time, it feels quite comforting, to hear something in this silence, even if it's my own voice.

I've put my hands on the sides of the sink, and I looked at myself in the mirror. My eyes bloodshot and my whole face it's made of a frown.

I tried to smile, and I smiled just when I touched with my right hand something and when I looked what it is, I immediately recognized the familiar object.

"Ashtrays even in the bathroom, huh?"  
>I've asked someone, or something while I held the object in front of me, and then I looked at the mirror, my smile has spread on my face, a painful smile.<p>

I've put the ashtray exactly as I found it, and I left from the bathroom, I didn't even wanted to take a shower, I didn't even intended to do something in the bathroom. I just entered, without a certain destination.

I sat on my couch that still had some sheets and a pillow on it, and I tried to fall asleep, but I couldn't.

Instead, I moved to the right and to the left, from an arm to another, embracing the pillow or trying not to touch it, and after not more than 2 minutes of struggling with everything that was on the couch and even the couch itself, I got up as if I would be burned.

In a way, I felt like I make everything worse than it is, like always, because after all, I confuse him with another.  
>But none of them has ever come back, so why would he be the only one who will?<p>

'I guess that this scares me the most…' I thought silent, as if I hide this thought, from everybody, but without a tiny part of my mind, almost like someone else could read my thought. I hid my own thoughts from my own mind, but not well enough.

I sat down on his chair, at his desk and I stared at the computer that is asleep. I wanted to turn it on, but something stopped me, I am a curious person after all, but I wanted to read just what he wants me to read.

'This if he will ever have the chance to talk to me again.'

I got up and walked to the bookcase, and I looked at different types of books. I took one out and then another, as if I am searching for a particular book. The back of my mind already knowing the truth about my search, but I won't let that thought to come to light, not yet.

At the sixth or at the seventh book which I took out and then, I put it back, at the eighth, I found it. One small photograph which was between the last books.

The fact about having a stranger in your house is just one, no matter how crazy you are or how much you think you are when you welcome one in it with the door open is that, even if crazy, you will hide your precious things, memories, from the curious eyes of the stranger.

Even if it's a photograph, or a personal poem, maybe a letter, but no matter what it is, it's always hidden between the books of your bookcase or in an old or too new notebook, in your closet and sometimes, even in the bathroom.

But even so, I always found things like this, not because I was the one that wanted to be rude and nor did I started to look for things that should be hidden for my blue eyes, but I found them, always, just when the crazy person has left and when that dear crazy person will never come back.

When I've made the last cleaning in the house, or when I really do a search for those things like I've done now, it became an ordinary thing that has to be done after the same endless situation.

But this is the first time when I really did it while I believed that I will find it right in that place.

'He's a writer, the irony...'

However, the photograph it's ordinary, simple. It has made me smile so much that my cheeks have begun to protest, and inside of me, I already know how it might look on the outside, a small and hurt smile.

The photograph had caught a moment in time, a moment when a black haired boy with pale skin, holds in his arms a black cat, while the boy is smiling with the very small and young black cat, that's in his arms with a towel around her.

I've turned the photo to its white side, and I've found nothing wrote on it.

I've put the picture back to its place, as if he would come and yell at me for searching in his things, and I've even put the book exactly as it was before.

I've put the photograph back because I didn't need it anymore. It was in my mind. A moment caught in time.

While I looked at the wooden floor, and not in front of me, I thought until I've reached the bed, and I've collapsed on it.

'It was Sasuke when he was younger, with Felix in his arms, when she also was little.'

I've said the thought in my mind and somehow, I just didn't know what was wrong with me.  
>Because, maybe, he has hidden the photograph somewhere where he thought, that I won't see it, or that I won't search for it?<p>

'No.' I thought while I put the blanket on me and also, while I disturbed Felix a little from her sleep.

What really bothers me, it's the reason. Why would someone hide a photograph like that? There was nothing wrong in that photograph; there was no one else in it, but him with Felix.

The room in which they were in that moment was this apartment, in the living room if I recall well.

And they seemed happy, Felix was there, and she didn't die, so what was the reason? Why to hide a photograph like that?

He wasn't very different than he is now, I mean, his hair is the same, even if it has grown a little now, he was still pale, of course, he was younger, but he wasn't ugly. He still isn't…

'So where's the problem?'

I've thought loud in my head, tired to think about it, too tired to find an answer.

So, I've embraced his pillow tighter and his scent has assaulted my nose, so I closed my eyes. Felix is right beside me, looking at me but also, she was about to sleep.

I embraced the pillow even tighter when I have intentionally begun to smell the pillow, and I just wanted to smell further.

I did not want to sleep, it felt wrong, but the pillow smelled just like him so it had begun to feel alright, as if he was here, in this moment, beside me.

Somewhere in the back of my mind, I asked myself questions like: 'Why do you have to embrace his pillow? And do you want to smell it?'

Of course I tried to ignore them, because I already had the answer. I have gone insane after how many times people left me so now I am thinking about him like I did the last time.

I just confuse them, like the last person who has left; it's responsible for the others.

Like if that person comes back, and then the rest of them will also come back.

The logic is the reality. The rest won't, and even more, the last time I've put all my trust that the person will come back, that person never came back.

So from the moment when I saw him walking out the door, I already knew.

'I lost him.'

I realized that I opened my eyes just when I was too tired to keep them open, while I was looking at a point in the air that doesn't exist.

I closed my eyes, and I tried not to think of anything.

That is when, I finally fell asleep.

When I woke up, it was because Felix was singing at the door of the bedroom.

When I started to realize what was happening around me, the first thing I did was to look at the clock.  
>'Already 8 PM?'<br>I slept all day, and I am still feeling unable to leave the bed.

The cat, however, did not like my idea of still staying in the bed, so instead of singing to the closed door, like already knowing that she won't be able to say ' Open Sesame! ', she jumped back in the bed and came closer to me.

She was very close to my face, but I still refused to move.

One caterwaul or two she did, but at that point I already was about to close my eyes and just when I was about to close them, her delicate paw was on my face, along with her sharp nails.

Felix has scratched the right side of my nose and a bit of my cheek.

"Why did you do that?"

I was surprised more than upset, this has never happened to me before.

I just looked in her eyes, searching for a reason, for something, for guilt burning in her, but there was none. Instead, she still looks at me like she still blames me because I don't open her door.

So I just sigh, I got up from the bed, and I opened the door.

"Please pass your Majesty." I said quite ironical to Felix while she walked to the living room while I held the door for her.

Even so, when I walked to the living room, she was already on the couch, in a sleeping posture.

I've become extremely annoyed just in one second, by the fact that she could have done that in the bed, like before.

Just then, I spoke while I ruffled the hair from the back of my head, and I've begun to yell:

"You spoiled this cat too much! Sas…" and I stopped.

The cat was still awake, and she was looking at me with her wide opened eyes.

And my hand has fallen to my sides, and my eyes were wide open with shock.

'Have I really gone insane?'

I thought, but I didn't dare to move an inch.

It was like I forgot what has really happened, and that he was not here, it was just like I pretended that it was all a bad dream and now that I woke up, he is here in this room.

It has happened to speak with myself out loud before, but not to call out to the missing person. For a minute, I waited for an answer.

However, I have already trembled while I'm thinking that maybe, he is here.

"Idiot! Tell me you're not dead!"

I shouted to the silence, and to the poor ears of Felix's, that ignores me while she has regained her posture.

'I confuse him, I only...'

I thought while I tried to calm down.

I spent the rest of the night while I drank the entire coffee that was in the apartment with the phone beside me along with his picture and a book.

I tried to read a book, but I didn't even read the title.  
>I just needed to look at something, at anything, even if I really don't see anything, and at 4 AM in the morning, I shouted:<br>"Who the hell doesn't have a TV these days?"

I shouted, but all that I've done with my question was to wake up Felix, and in the back of my mind, I was almost one percent sure, I am insane.

I continued to read the book, even if I had no idea what it was about, like nothing has ever happened.

I've realized that I had fallen asleep, somewhere in the morning, on the couch.

Even if it took me some minutes to realize that I am on the couch, and that I fell asleep.

My sleep has been so deep that I felt like a stone that has reached the bottom of the river, just now.

And before I could open my tired eyes, the entrance door has been opened by someone.

I refused to open my eyes just because I thought that I should pretend that I sleep, until I realize who this is.

'A thief? A serial killer?' I thought silent in my head. As if the stranger could actually hear my thoughts if I would have said them in my mind a bit louder.

The steps were closer, and my breaths were shorter and shorter. Until when I've actually realized that the stranger is right beside the couch, actually, beside me.

The hand moved slowly, and when it touched my arm was for me to rise up from the couch and almost to shout while I held his stretched hand in place.

I opened my tired blue eyes to see, black eyes.

To be continued…

Yes, a few hours later but now it's here. I hope you liked it. Until next time.


	7. Read me Please!

Read it! It's important!

Sadly...this is not a new chapter, but I will try to write it the week that will come, I think that I should begin to write one chapter in two weeks, it would be better for me at least, I have many stories that also deserve attention and it's hard because I think just about this story.

But anyway, if you think otherwise or if you agree with me, tell me! I will take any idea in consideration, questions or anything, I begin to think that you guys don't like this story and I feel sad about it, if you have a certain reason about why you don't like something therefore you don't review or something else, tell me! So I know what I do wrong also, opinions about if you like a chapter per week or should do one in two weeks.

Well, I will wait patiently and again, I'm sorry that I didn't updated this week.


	8. Chapter 7:Lost within fake smiles

From morning until dusk  
>The sunrise will bring color for the grey clouds,<br>Because even the lies can do a favor…  
>To the heart that has forgotten life's colors.<p>

Eye to eye, dust to dust…  
>Regrets are better left unspoken,<br>Cheek to cheek, sin to sin…  
>Distance it's just a small detail when it comes to lusting.<p>

Chapter 7: Lost within fake smiles

You know... when the morning sun has finally regained its place on the sky, and when its strength isn't the greatest, but the most gentle.

The reflection of the sun on the water it's the same, but the water isn't. The shape and the colors are like a perfect amount of splashed paint all over the ocean.

However, the human will barely notice the clouds, the human will observe the rays, the colors that are like the scent of flowers, everywhere in the air, and that are spreading across the whole sky like petals in the tireless wind.

So, the clouds become like white papers, nothing written on them, untouched, but always like the first layer of snow of the winter, perfectly white.

And the rays of the sun it's the paint, which creates, the most spectacular painting, which every single human and creature can see and adore.

But the water is blurry, and like the humans, barely noticing the clouds, even the structure of the sun isn't clear, but the colors are endlessly spreading as they collide along with the waves.

The whole structure it's certainly beautiful, but also, sad.

'Cause you know...the water...the ocean...it's blind.

That's what I thought when I stared into black eyes which seemed to be exactly blind to everything that's around them, the shapes and the rays of colors reflect in his eyes, but he doesn't follows them, it doesn't bothers him, like the black it's absorbing everything inside, judging everything as 'nothing'.

Everything, absolutely everything seems absorbed by the black iris which stares into my blue one, but it doesn't sees and along with everything else around, my reality, my thoughts, words and feelings disappeared, also, absorbed.

The minutes have passed, but none of us has moved one single inch.

I've felt something at my leg, but I didn't looked until I've heard the usual song which Felix sings, but even if there are the usual sounds, if I could name this song which is different from the others, the name of it would be: Worried.

But so I felt when I had to force myself back to reality, to look at Felix and then at Celine who is still just three steps away from the door with her hands crossed at her chest, her posture which could simply be named: Tired.

Just then, I looked in front of me, at a black hair which seemed to be made of feathers of ravens, with pale skin as snow but still, like marble, and with one of his hand in my hands, long slim fingers, and bloodshot black eyes, small red veins painted in the white structure while embracing the black one.

I am still on the couch, and I still feel like I'm the only one who doesn't realize the situation even after whole minutes.

The man before me isn't a ghost, it's the man who left and of which I thought that will never come back to this house, to this room, or to me.

'This is a dream.' I thought, calm, too calm and as I underlined this thought alone, and I even let time pass after so it can settle down.

'It's a dream, isn't it?' I thought for the second time, and this time, I slowly begun to touch his hands, judging if they are really there or not, and then his arm, and finally, with one hand holding his stretched hand and with the other, I touched his cheek, face, lips, eyes which have closed at my touch.

"You're real?"

I asked and with my hand still on his cheek, he covered it with his own free hand and I just stared into bloodshot eyes.

"Yeah." He responded and I sat myself down normally on the couch.

'He came back.' This thought covered the rest of them; the sea of thoughts was covered by just a drop from it. But it was enough.

Like you've just accepted to swim the whole ocean, and all of your fears disappeared when someone told you just before you have to start swimming:

'You won't die if you continue to swim; you won't drown even if you stop.'

It seems impossible to believe it, but that's why I'm so confused, or mostly shocked.

"You came back." I said while looking ahead of me, while he holds my hands and stays in front of the couch staring at me: Worried and tired.

He didn't say a word, and soon enough, I started to yell:

"Where the hell have you been? Why the hell did you left? How old are you? You're not a freaking teenager or a ten year old child! Why the hell didn't you left any explanation? Who the hell do you think you are? ...Who..."

My words have died in my throat, as if when I begun to yell I was on the surface of the water, and now, I'm on the bottom where everything is dark and I no longer can breathe.

Water, no, tears; I felt them on my hand while it took me ten seconds to realize that they are mine.

He just looked at me while I cried and thought:

'You are the only one that came back.' And that thought alone brought me tears, after all, I didn't cried for years, from when I was younger, a brat, a blond brat with just one name, after all, I had no family. They all have abandoned me.

So many questions have formed in my mind with years, but there was no one to answer me.

Questions that now can be answered but just now I realize, I don't care about the answers, I just wish he could promise that he will never leave me again, I don't care about the reason why or with whom, just...

"I'm sorry." He said and he embraced me.

I embraced him back and continued to cry, and after a while, I saw black.

I opened my eyes and I saw the peaceful living room, nothing changed. I think I fell asleep on the couch.

I got up even if it hurt to just open my eyes. I cried so much that I got a headache and a slight fever.

But just then, I looked in front of me to see a sleeping Felix.

One white blanket it's over me and a pain in my chest while my head has also woken up along with me.

'It was just a dream? He ...'

I refused to finish my thought; I got up and ran in his room to see no one, almost completely alarmed until I heard someone talking.

I ran to the kitchen and when I was about to be in sight for the talking humans, I stopped.

'But who is it?'

Just the thought of not knowing scared me, I took one step back and I listened.

With my hands holding the wall until they turned white. And concentrating so much that my head it's spinning, but still, when I heard a voice, everything was numb, and in the same time, everything I was became just a huge ear listening in the complete silence to the voices.

"You have to tell him the truth! He deserves it!" The voice of a woman spoke, rebelled.

"You don't know what you're saying, even if I want to tell him, it's just impossible." A voice of a man replied.

"Then let me tell him. I..." The woman begun again but was cut off.

"No. I told you that I want to do this myself. But not now..." The man spoke again.

"But when? And what will you do if he asks you? You know it's inevitable!" The woman said in an exasperated tone.

"I don't know, believe me, but I just can't..." The man finished and the silence begun.

When the silence embraced the apartment, I realized, it wasn't any stranger, rebelled woman, it is Celine. And how can I forget? The man's voice can't be others but Sasuke's.

In the same time, I've put the blame on myself, or for my ways to lie to myself.

I realized whom the voices belong to, but I just didn't want to stop listening to their conversation.

'What can't you tell me?' I wanted to ask him but it seems that I won't get an answer even if he's here.

I took steps ahead until I entered in the kitchen.

Celine leaning on a counter while he is in front of her, while his back it's facing me.

"Why do you insist so much? He's after all, a stranger..."

The words he said cut deep, and I am right beside him, Celine stared at me with wide eyes, and I think that just then, he realized:

"He's behind me, isn't he?"

Celine nodded and he turned around to look at me.

'He's right, I'm a stranger, I just confuse him with the other people who abandoned me...It's not his fault.'

I thought but I didn't say anything, but after a few seconds, he broke the silence:

"I'm sorry, I just..." He begun but I spoke over him.

"Don't. After all, I really am a stranger so..."

I said and just closed my eyes and then, I opened them again.

Like the sand from an hourglass, the hours have passed, drop by drop, bit by bit. And soon enough, it was night, and I was still on the couch, where I've been the entire day. However, he didn't stood one second in one place, I don't even recall what he has done. I stared at the carpet or at the window, outside, but I didn't said a word, and nor did I moved.

At one certain point though, Felix got up from the couch and from then, I still don't know where she is but the look she gave me before she left was like she was bored of staying and not doing anything.

'I'm more futile, than the cat herself.'

But this has happened just with some hours after when Celine has left, and that has happened in the middle of the day, many hours ago.

The sun slowly disappeared from my view, and then the moon made its appearance.

In my opinion, the moon has always been clearer in the water than the sun, maybe because the stars are the rays of the moon, and the entire color isn't just in one point, the ghostly moon staring back at me with an unchanging expression.

But without me noticing, he was in his chair from the desk, but not with his eyes on the screen of the computer but with his eyes at me, lucky, I realized he was there right when he was about to talk:

"Naruto, I'm sorry, really, and you can ask me anything you want. I promise that I will try my best to answer, and I'll do anything just..."

He said and then he sigh, realizing that I'm the one blind this time, blind like the air when the night comes and when the colors of the rays of the moon, the stars, are the only ones to color the dark. The tiny …almost dying hope.

"I don't have anything to ask you." I said and continued to look at the window.

He just continued to stare at me, I could feel it, and then, he begun to talk again:

"Look, I don't know how to explain this situation, I just ..." and he stopped.

With one hand in his hair, he stared at me. And I realize that I do the same.

He walked to the couch, sat down beside me and then he talked again, in a pleading voice while staring into my eyes:

"Please, anything, you can ask anything you want." He said and I spoke:

"I have one question." I said and he seemed even more attentive as he spoke:

I looked into his eyes that still had small red veins that I guess that they had something to do with the smell of alcohol he had when he came back that when he embraced me, it was impossible not to notice.

"Ask me." He said.

So, I smiled, a small fake smile while I asked him:

"Why did you come back?"

To be continued…

Yeah, very late, I had no review so I got sad and angry in the same time so I couldn't really write so it's way late, but it's here. Hope you liked it. And yes, Naruto is very sad in this one and no, it isn't because I didn't want him to be a spoiled annoying brat and over positive and with a colored language on top of it. It's because when you have been abandoned once then the second time and all; think a little, he can't be positive! So don't be angry at me! The pasts are very important in a story when you begin with it like in the middle of their life…

Anyway, don't expect me to just say it all in one row and explain it, no way! Sorry for the suspense though.

However, I plan on making their bond stronger from now on because now they blame each other for being strangers as you see. I don't forget that they are still not even friends but just affected by their pasts.

If there are any mistakes tell me where to correct them, I have other stories that I need to update and I didn't have much time to correct it…I'm very sorry about it though so I ask for your welcomed help.

So…I will appreciate any word you want to tell me, you opinion or idea counts! So please, I beg for some attention here!

Anyway, no matter if I get reviews or not, I sincerely just hope you like this story, that's all that matters to me.

Thank you.


	9. Chapter 8:Fear of silence

I'm not sober all the time, I stay so I can be found, I'm always here,  
>But when I wake up too early it means that I had another nightmare.<p>

I'm not sad all the time, but I have a talent for remembering the past times,  
>Which have hurt me, made me cry, almost killed me, but never the happy ones.<p>

I'm not ironic all the time, just when I'm brought down by the unfair world,  
>And I just don't know how to shut up, or so I was told.<p>

I'm not silent all the time, just when my world is made of black,  
>And my lips are glued to my thoughts, someone's words are what I lack.<p>

I'm not sober all the time, but even when I dream I continue to listen, until I feel too tense...  
>Hoping to hear your voice, that you'll save me, but every single time I listen, I hear...<br>I hear...  
>I hear..<p>

…... silence.

Chapter 8: Fear of silence

Please, anything, you can ask anything you want." He said, and I spoke:

"I have one question." I said, and he seemed even more attentive as he spoke:

I looked into his eyes that still had small red veins that I guess that they had something to do with the smell of alcohol he had when he came back that when he embraced me, it was impossible not to notice.

"Ask me." He said.

So, I smiled, a small fake smile while I asked him:

"Why did you come back?"

He seemed troubled by my question, even confused, while I waited for him to find his words.

"I left because...of someone from my past who knows of this apartment and who wanted to come back ... I was afraid that he will come back, and without thinking, I just ran away. And I..."

Within his explanation which came out rather complicated for him to say, he stopped after almost every single word, and in the end, I stopped him:

"I don't care why you've left." I heard myself saying, as if the words aren't mine, as if I am not the one who's saying them, but I continued, ignoring the unknown feeling.

"Why did you come back?" I asked him, and I watched, while he closed his eyes and then, with his eyes still closed, he answered me:

"I don't know." He said and then he continued with his eyes open:

"Celine told me that I am a coward, that you are waiting for me...that you're desperate, and...I don't know." He finished with his eyes attentive at me.

I think he didn't realize that while speaking, he grabbed my left hand tight, as if he was confessing.

But he realized when I took my hand back, releasing it from his grip, and just then, I spoke:

"Don't try to force me into your mess, you didn't came back for me, you came back for yourself." I whispered, and even I could hear the venom in my voice.

"That's what I'm telling you! I don't know why I came back! But I don't regret it! Narut..." He begun, from yelled words, to a whisper filled with worry which was just my name, a whisper which has been told when I rose up from my spot, and I begun to take off my clothes, or what I thought about them, his clothes.

Still, he also rose up when he understood, and he even put his hands on mine to stop me from taking off my blouse, his blouse, which was pulled just halfway.

"What are you doing?" He asked me with a dead tone, a voice from a tomb.

"Leaving. What? You think you're the only one who's allowed to leave?" I asked in a mocking tone.

"Why?" He asked with his dead voice. He even closed his eyes after.

I can't tell if it's because of anger or worry.

"Why do you even care? I'm a stranger, you're a stranger! I don't want to live with someone like you!" I said, mostly yelled, and his hands have fallen by his sides, slowly but surely.

'This doesn't sounds right...I've been too harsh, maybe?' I thought, and I ignored his eyes, eyes which hold a message, but I can't understand it.

I took off the blouse, and thrown it on the couch.

I walked to the bathroom, almost ran, and I took my old clothes which are put in a plastic bag, already washed but somehow, hidden.

I've put them on, with the bathroom door open, though, in the back of my mind, I knew he is still in the middle of the living room.

And when I finished, I made two steps out of the bathroom, and I looked just to confirm my thoughts.

'He's not moving.' I thought, quietly, somehow alarmed but I said nothing.

I've put my right hand on the knob of the entrance door, but after I stared at my hand, I looked back at him, his back facing me.

'What am I doing?' I asked myself, but I refused to answer.

And just when I've pulled the knob to open the door, I felt something at my feet.

Felix, staring at me, with two worried eyes. She knows what I'm doing; it's not hard to figure it out, after all.

'Why do I already feel guilty?' Another question, but the last one, as I opened the suddenly heavy door, knowing that its sound will haunt me, opened and then closed, its sound echoed through the whole apartment, through the most unreachable and dense silence.

Heavy steps are carrying me to nowhere. After all, I have no home, I have nowhere to go, and I no longer have someone who can welcome me in its house.

'I no longer have...' I thought, bitterly.

I just arrived at the boundary, the steps of the block's entrance; it took just seconds to get here, maybe one minute at least, but no more.

However, the weather also wants to stop me from leaving, or so it sounds for me. The thunders and the rain's song echoing all around, on the now, empty streets.

Which are welcoming me how they know best, with no one but me on them. Alone.

Even so, I sat myself on the first step, the ceiling which is still covering me where I stay, protecting me from the angry rain.

Or maybe the rain isn't angry, it seems sad, just the thunder scares me a little.

The lighting and the thunder are like pain. With its power, grace and fury, it strikes. Once it's enough to light the whole sky. And so it's the pain, one scar, one word, and just one single feeling can make your whole heart to cry in aches, to slow your breathings, and to almost make you feel like you've died.

It's enough for the sound of the thunder to make your heart stop for a second, and for the lighting to make its dance until it arrives to earth, to light your whole being, to cut you open, in two, its tentacles spreading pure, irremediable, and astonishing pain.

'It no longer matter that I regret what I've done, it's already done.' I thought and closed my eyes while I walked on the steps which are leading me at empty streets, at the unmerciful wind and in the pouring rain.

'At pain.'

One more step and the rain washed me, looking up at the sky with my eyes closed, I felt...

'Cold.' I thought alarmed as I felt one hand on my right shoulder, as I immediately twisted myself to look at the owner.

To see a man standing before me, with his hand still on my shoulder, a smirk embracing his lips, as he spoke to me from under the hood:

"You know if the writer, Uchiha Sasuke lives in this block?"

The question has shot the noise of the rain, of the wind and even of the thunder, making everything numb.

His voice was everything I heard, as if the rest was embraced by silence.

To be continued…

Sorry, suspense it's my second name (kidding).

But anyway, you have to wait until next time which will probably be in two weeks because I decided to do a chapter once two weeks, just one week it's getting hard and I also tend to miss my deadline as you see and it's better so I can actually do it right.

However, I want to thank Akirakun17 for its review, the sad parts will continue a little bit though I hope you'll like happy ones too or at least funny ones 'cause I want to also do that but later. And yes, it has been revenge in some way as I narrated, hope you're happy with it and maybe you didn't want to but you also gave me this idea while I read your review so I really thank you from the bottom of my heart, I really hope I didn't disappoint you though I leave it at a suspense again…sorry.

So, sasunaruhugznkisses, I hope you're still reading and I hope I also didn't disappoint you, you didn't said anything for a while, I am a bit worried.

Also, mu149 and skyglazingMaro, the same worry.

For blauherz, I'm sorry if I bored you with my long descriptions then, I just wanted to describe the apartment and it got the best out of me, or mostly, my worse, I just wanted you readers to know everything around and I also like to imagine but it just happened that way, I mostly felt the need to do so because we will stay in this apartment for a long time. But again, I sincerely apologize to you and I hope you're still reading.

I hope nobody is offended by me responding to the reviews here, but I'm really grateful for them, it makes me work harder and I really feel happy when someone says that it likes what I write.

Still, sorry for this short chapter and see you next week, I also want to announce that I have a poll, if anybody is interested, your opinion matters very much to me for this story and in that poll.

Again, thank you.


	10. Chapter 9:Lost between snowflakes

I can breathe, I can walk, and I can think, the doctors say that I'm alive  
>But they don't feel what I feel, no bone or vein it's cracked in me,<br>It's spring but a part of me has died, while everything else it's again, alive.

I can see you smiling at me every time the sun arises  
>As if it's the summer when we first met,<br>The nights were many, but the days seemed to be more than ever, too less.

The colored leafs have made a carpet from the pavement  
>As we walked together, hand in hand,<br>But I should've known that the wind was my own punishment.

The winter has come here, snowflakes covering the whole earth  
>But it's like I'm the only one that feels cold and alone,<br>I often wonder: "Where did you go, my warmth?"

Chapter 9: Lost between snowflakes

One more step and the rain washed me, looking up at the sky with my eyes closed, I felt...

'Cold.' I thought alarmed as I felt one hand on my right shoulder, as I immediately twisted myself to look at the owner.

To see a man standing before me, with his hand still on my shoulder, a smirk embracing his lips, as he spoke to me from under the hood:

"You know if the writer, Uchiha Sasuke lives in this block?"

The question has shot the noise of the rain, of the wind and even of the thunder, making everything numb.

His voice was everything I heard, as if the rest was embraced by silence.

The time seems to have stopped in this very moment, while the drops of water fall all around us on the pavement, the colorless substance eclipses all the other existent colors of this world, she makes copies of them, she camouflages them into her inexistent color, into obscurity.

But in my mind, everything became white, as if the drops of water are camouflaging just one color, white. Thousands, no, even more, of white snowflakes fall from the sky, all around us, the space and time no longer exists, 'cause the whole space has become a colony of snowflakes, one over another one, creating one pure and immaculate white.

Where the sound and time can't perturb, destroy or dirty it.

'It's enough, move.'

I thought but my mouth continued to hang open.

With my eyes wide open, I asked myself why I am so shocked, but somehow, I know and that is what terrifies me.

" _"Why_ _did you come back?"_

_He seemed troubled by my question, even confused, while I waited for him to find his words._

_"I left because...of someone from my past who knows of this apartment and who wanted to come back ... I was afraid that he will come back, and without thinking, I just ran away. And I..." "_

The memory has appeared in my mind, in the same time when the thunder has broken the sky in two, with its sound and color. The face of the stranger covered in its light just for one second.

"No. He doesn't live here." I heard my sentence in the song of the silence, of my white snowflakes.

"I see..." He said with his smirk gone, and he patted my shoulder once, and then he walked away, like a shadow of the rain.

It must've lasted just some mere seconds in reality.

'Now what?' I asked myself while I've begun to run, back, to his apartment

Drops of water falling from my hair, from my clothes, and from my blue cap.

With my hand in the air, wondering what it's my next move.

'I met the person whom he's running from, I just saved him somehow, but I don't know if he will come back, or maybe that man was just a fan of his books, or something like that, maybe...'

Word after word, and excuses after excuses have appeared in my mind. But my poor hand is still hanging in the air. Wondering if I should enter or not in the back of my mind.

Somehow, after some seconds of fighting with myself, I decided to make order in my mind, to make silence so I can decide, and so, without any thought involved, I've put my hand on the knob of the door.

'Have you forgotten why you've left?'

The thought has appeared from nowhere, but it has made my eyes to open but not alone, my mind has also opened the remembrance, in the same time, as the thunder.

" _Still, he also rose up when he understood, and he even put his hands on mine to stop me from taking off my blouse, his blouse, which was pulled just halfway._

_"What are you doing?" He asked me with a dead tone, a voice from a tomb._

_"Leaving. What? You think you're the only one who's allowed to leave?" I asked in a mocking tone._

_"Why?" He asked with his dead voice. He even closed his eyes after._

_I can't tell if it's because of anger or worry._

_"Why do you even care? I'm a stranger, you're a stranger! I don't want to live with someone like you!" I said, mostly yelled, and his hands have fallen by his sides, slowly but surely.""_

As if copying its move, its pain, its color, as if I am the drop of water which is in the storm while I know he is the snowflake, cold and lonely, my hand has fell by my side.

'I have no right to be worried about him, he is the first one to come back after he left me, and instead of being happy about it, I left him.'

I thought quietly as I let my back to slide against the entrance door.

I stood there; I slept there, until the morning has arrived, until the sun woke me up with its rays.

But even if I'm awake, I didn't get up from my place at all.

Until the door has asked me to get up. And I did, and I hid behind the wood of the door, in its shadow, in the dark, and I watched as he made its steps on the sandstone.

'Hey, old man... I've met the person you're hiding from and he was kind of creepy, but I told him that you're not here anymore, even though I don't know if he believed me, be careful...Sasuke...'

The sentence has been told, in my mind, I told him everything as I watched him walking away to nowhere, washed in the rays of the sun until I could no longer see him.

'I'm sorry.' I continued the rest of my sentence as I felt the urge to cry getting stronger and stronger.

And so, I got up and I ran away, away from him, away from me, and away from everything.

…..*…..….

" _I said and he moved, I felt him but I dared not to look at him while I've realized that he has sat himself normally on the bank too, at my left, but he doesn't looks in front of him, like me but at me._

_"So, you're a cop or something?"_

_He asked me, but he doesn't seem frightened to ask this, and for a moment, I wanted to say yes, just to see if he would run away from me right now if my answer would be affirmative._

_"Do I look like a cop to you?"_

_Childish, if I could only name him in any other way. He put one leg over the other one that is on the bank, and he kept them there with his two hands while he just balanced his body, back and forward while he still talks to me._

_"Well, I don't know, you walk through the park at midnight so maybe you do some shitty night tour."_

_"Wrong." _

_I somehow felt like he didn't mean those words but said them just as if to continue our conversation. The same I want after all, too, because I could give all of his answers and our conversation would be long gone, but no. We continue to ask, to taunt, to talk just so we won't be just us and the silence, us and the wind, us and the empty park."_

The memory, because it had become a memory, I watched it playing before my eyes, as I stand in the middle of my living room.

How much time has passed since he left?

'I don't know.'

Why do I react like this?

'I don't know.'

Somehow, I realize that the real him has been showed to me just in that park, because since I got him in my apartment, I saw just fragments of the real him. He changed his behavior because of me and I hated it, every single bit.

'The real him…'

" "_The smoke from my cigarette has begun dirtying the air of the night while he begun to talk irritated._

_"You tell me not to smoke, but you can?"_

_I knew he will wait for my answer so I inspired the poison from my cigarette to my lungs again while the evidence were left in the air and then, I've turned my head to look at him while I knew he still looks at me and that he won't look somewhere else._

_I bowed my head a little closer to him so just I could gain his attention to what I say._

_"You're underage, aren't you?"_

_I asked and he didn't seem to be surprised by my question at all, while he smiled and talked to me while he bowed his head closer to me too, copying my earlier move._

_"Sure you're not a cop?"_

_He asked but none of us moved so I just looked forward and I took a taste from my cigarette again and then, I let it to be blown away by the small breeze that has passed and finished with my smoke in the same time.""_

'And …'

" _"Wow!"_

_I was lost in my thoughts when he suddenly exclaimed from my bedroom in which I didn't observed that he entered._

_'Quick boy.' I thought while I've realized that he must have opened the door slowly so I wouldn't hear him while smoking my cigarette and maybe I even seemed to think about something else._

_'I took my eyes off of him just for a second.'_

_I ignored almost all that he said because he mostly made useless comments, more to himself, but I quickly ran to my own bedroom when he yelled._

_He is now on the bed with Felix in his arms._

_I just walked to my table and I thrown the now finished cigarette, and I immediately lit another one and just then I spoke to him:_

_"Why did you scream if you're not scared of cats?"_

_I asked him in a monotone voice while I successfully lit another cigarette and I immediately begun to devour it._

_"I was just surprised by it."_

_He said while he still rubs the cat and the cat answered with its purring. "_

'…and...'

" _But I remained in reality while I watched his face, the rebel blond hair and the closed eyes._

_I put the cigarette between my lips again and let it there while with my right hand I begun to slowly pull down the shirt that was up, but I was surprised and my eyes opened wider, as if the thunder has spread and exploded on the sky again, but no._

_He caught my hand with his and then he has turned himself on his right side, still holding onto my hand as if he is holding a teddy bear to his chest._

_'He doesn't realize.' I thought quickly while I closed my eyes for a second._

_I tried to retreat my hand, but at first, he didn't allowed me, but the second time I tried while holding onto his hand, and I tried to retreat the other trapped hand, I succeed but didn't, 'cause he caught the hand with which I tried to free the other one._

_I stared at him while I couldn't believe he behaves like this even when he is asleep._

_'What was in my head?'_

_I continued to stare at him while he made a sound which I couldn't identify as anything else than a groan of a man asleep, but still…_

_'How tired are you?'_

_I stared at our hands without any real motive, my mind blank and my cigarette continued to burn on its own while I asked nothing from it._

_"Sasuke?"_

_I've quickly looked up at him but I remained the same. But he is with sleepy and confused blue eyes staring back at me._

_We both know our positions, and there is nothing to be embarrassed about but I am sure I will soon become a little because without reason, we continue to stare at each other's eyes and none of us will move._

_"Good morning."_

_I said and I've realized that I could hear the water drops on the window of the living room too. I could hear the rain but there was no thunder, just the child that it's still crying._

_He stared at me and he closed its eyes as if trying to come back to reality and then he spoke in a low sleepy voice:_

_"Morning." "_

'…and this was the real him for sure…'

""_So…"_

_He began to say while he still walks through the apartment, left and right until he sat down beside me._

_"I can pretty much figure out that this couch is my bed, but you will at least give one blanket, no?"_

_I almost forgot that it's still night and that we must sleep. When I answered him with an affirmative answer some hours ago, I didn't think where he will sleep or things like that. All I knew was that I wanted something new in my life and it seemed that I just did it; I just received the opportunity of a change._

_'Even if I am not the spontaneous type, not at all…'_

_"A blanket comes"_

_I said as I got up and walked to my bedroom, to the closet and I took out a blanket and one white sheet and then to my bed and I took one pillow from the two that are, then walked back to the living room, but he was gone._

_'Why you…"_

_I've put the things on the couch and right then, I heard something that came from the kitchen._

_When I walked in, he was with his head in the fridge. I sat myself against the wall behind him and with my hands at my chest, and I made a small coughing sound to get his attention._

_He hit his head to one of the shelf that was above his head of the fridge and then he immediately begun to massage the hurt spot while he turned around and looked at me with a small smile. Felix has run away from his arms after he hit his head._

_"I was… I just…" "_

'…and then…'

" _So he is now standing, leaning into the wall of the theater, and looks at me and after some seconds, he spoke:_

_"Why don't you smoke inside?"_

_"It's not allowed."_

_I answered and just then I realized something._

_"It's your first time coming to a theater?"_

_I asked him and he quickly stopped looking at me. He has closed his eyes, and then he looked at the ground while talking to me.  
>"Yeah, so what? Anyway, you won't give me one of yours even if I ask you nicely, no?"<em>

_I've realized that he has changed the subject with something that would really work, the cigarettes that I don't want him to smoke, but I am not so young to don't know what he does but I just pretend I didn't noticed and I continue his game._

_'I won't force him to tell me if he doesn't want to.' I thought and just then I answered him._

_"I won't give you one, even if you'll beg me. You're still underage."_

_I said really relaxed and he didn't stare at the ground anymore but at me, smiling._

_'That can't be good.' I thought quickly while I met his gaze._

_"If I begin to shout like crazy, you'll give me one, no?"_

_He said and I responded, with smoking a bit more in his face._

_"You can shout all you want. They'll throw you somewhere, not me, and you will have to stay on the streets until the play will end because you don't even have a key."_

_I said rather calm and he didn't seem to enjoy my answer. His smile has quickly disappeared. "_

'…and now…'

I thought and I remembered while I got up from the couch, didn't even realized that I sat myself down and then, to realize that it's already morning.

I begun to walk, barely realizing that I'm at the entrance door, opening it and with unsure steps while my mind was sure about what to think about, what to see instead of reality, I walked at first on the sandstone of the apartment then, on the pavement.

Remembering:

""_What are you doing?" I asked him with a dead tone, a voice from a tomb._

_"Leaving. What? You think you're the only one who's allowed to leave?" He asked me in a mocking tone._

_"Why?" I asked with my dead voice. I even closed my eyes after._

_I can't tell if it's because I'm angry or worried._

_"Why do you even care? I'm a stranger, you're a stranger! I don't want to live with someone like you!" He said, mostly yelled, and my hands have fallen by my sides, slowly but surely." "_

And then, I looked back at the apartment, while I'm several steps ahead of it but not many and I saw a blond boy with bright blue eyes running from the block to the opposite direction of where I am, a blond boy with tears in his eyes.

I watched him with sad eyes, while my feet feel like they are pinned in the pavement, I feel like something in me has broke in two. While I thought, while I feel like I want to talk to him and I do.

_"Tell me your name."_

_I said after I've realized that he won't say any word after some seconds of pure silence._

_I looked up at him and he looked down at me while he was surprised by my words._

_"Naruto. My name is Naruto."_

_He said and in that moment, I stood up and I looked him in the eye._

_"Well, Naruto, would you like me to tell you to come with me at an empty apartment, with little food in which it's too hot when it's summer and too cold in the winter, with me, a stranger?"_

_I asked while his smile was so big and so sad that I could not beat an eyelash until he spoke again._

_"Yes, I would like this answer very much."_

_I could tell that no matter the fact that I could be a serial killer and my apartment to have the most despicable conditions; it would be more pleasant than to sleep on a bank in the park, all alone._

_After all, I knew those feelings so well, too well._

_So I sat down on the bank again, on my spot, and opened my cigarette package and I lit one cigarette,then put everything back and I can enjoy the taste, the smoke is left in the air and then my words have came with the breeze of the late summer in that day._

_"Then this is your answer."_

_He is confused, even more than confused, the possibility that I really want to take him with me, he cannot tell if I'm serious or not. He cannot tell if he is right when he thinks that he has just received an affirmative answer. So, our game with our own words has come to an end when he asked me the final question, while he boils of curiosity._

_"You mean that I can go with you, you mean that I live with you now and that…"_

_He said rather quickly and all that I do is to nod my head in affirmation, up and down while the air is now dirty._

_While he almost jumped when he realized and ran towards me and embraced me and after some seconds of silence, he got up and talked again._

_"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable, uh, I …don't know…"_

_Happy, that is the feeling that he feels in this moment, that feeling alone._

_Even the fear that his expectations would be destroyed didn't dare to touch his happiness._

_So, all I did was to enjoy my cigarette, while he manifested his nervousness and happiness right in front of my very eyes._

_"But…"_

_He suddenly said and just then, I almost finished my cigarette while he spoke to me once again._

_"You didn't tell me what's your name yet…"_

_He said and I could tell that he tried to resist the urge to say old man again and he just stared at me, waiting. While I thrown the cigarette to my feet while I stood up and crushed it in the same time under my shoe, and then, I responded him._

_"Sasuke, Sasuke Uchiha."_

And so, as I stopped walking, stopped in one particular spot in time and space, I talked to him, within me:

'Hey, Naruto, you really are a runaway, aren't you?'

I thought, as I continued to walk away in my direction, slowly, moving along with my memories in my mind, walking towards nowhere.

To be continued…

Ta Dam! Long chapter, huh? Well, there are mostly just memories in it so it's not so very long for me even if I thought about the times when I've showed the true character of Naruto, to explain, Naruto is really a brat in my story, well not a bad one, but with a dirty mouth, I mean about the way he talks and all that and these are the parts where he shows a bit of them in each but then, he acts grateful and all that because he wants to, he is really a runaway and this is not his home, yet, so he acts like the owner does, as you can see, he doesn't swears because Sasuke told him not to, and many other things, the only thing he didn't change was the thing with the 'old man' which he uses until the very end, well that's for now.

The action starts after all! I've put many small things in each chapter so they will tell about the character or about the past, but each thing at a time people!

And I hope everybody realized that at the middle or not so, almost at the beginning, the point of view changes, after Naruto runs away and we come back to Sasuke's point of view, as I explained before, 5 chapter each character but I guess I should've done it in chapter 10, not 9 but I did it with the simple reason which is: I'm the writer and I hope I didn't upset you guys because of it but I just couldn't do it differently, I wish I could've keep it like 5 chapter each, I will try to do it from now on, well, it depends even so…

It's a sad chapter…at least for me, I think it is, but anyway, hope everybody liked it!

The next chapter will be up in two weeks, aka 7, 8 or 9 October.

I don't know if I told you guys but I will continue to tell you guys about my poll until I get more votes. Hope I annoy you enough to make you participate (yeah, I am evil but I am not in a good mood right now, I am even sick so…sorry anyway).

See you next time.


	11. Chapter 10:Wordless

Wondering with my eyes, as if I'm curious  
>But my eyes have no light left in them, no real intention to see,<br>I've realized when I've accepted what I have, accepted to have less...  
>Just the tiny pieces which are rusted and broken, but they're mine to steal.<p>

My walk has lost its dance, its grace and my back, its feathers  
>Now it's like I'm running away with my every step, with my every word...<br>Always in circles, always in endless rows...  
>Of words, memories, places, faces, and more words and words.<p>

Dreams filled with birds in cages, locked, singing a sad song  
>Black and red roaches scare me as they cover me, my breath no longer slow…<br>But the morning brings with its light and with the start of a new day...  
>My eyelids up, my iris attentive but in the same time it brings: Nothing at all.<p>

As I search for something of which I already know...  
>I can't find it; it's invisible for my eyes which now can see just white and black,<br>I try to fill my hours of loneliness with my searching...  
>I listen to my heart of which I think it has a reason...<br>For being unbearably silent.

Chapter 10: Wordless

It has no sense of humor, the street filled with humans. Like insects, they just make annoying and endless sounds, while they make rounds around the same place, again and again.

And I am, like they are, a dot from them all. It's not bothering me, 'cause I can't imagine being anything else. But I wish I wouldn't be a lone dot, like many others, I wish there would be someone beside me.

However, this wish is so old, like an apple that's rotten, and you ask God to give you permission, you beg him to let you eat, to let you eat just one rotten apple.

A clear sky with white clouds and a powerful but gentle sun have made their way, after struggling with the countless grey clouds and with an unmerciful wind, somehow, the white clouds and the gentle sun have won.

The beautiful weather might have won the battle against the ugly one, but I didn't.

I, a writer with books that I wish I would have never published, because they are not mine, they are invented, so creative that at some point I just can't believe that my hand has wrote them.

I, a man with just a cat, at my age, with no wife or child, and with just one single friend.

I stay on a chair at a round table, at a normal coffee. Outside, not inside, just so Celine might see where I am.

My coffee is still on the table from the moment my order has been brought, and it's still untouched.

I know I should be attentive on the road, on the street, just so I might see her. But I am not attentive at reality.

However, I realized that she has arrived when a woman has harshly sat down on the other chair from my table, and she barely sat down and she already begun to whine:

"Oh...The traffic it's a nightmare! You wouldn't believe how many times I have almost died just to get here!"

Her familiar voice has made me a bit attentive, but in the same time, it didn't.

And we both agreed, my silence is my definitive answer.

I barely heard her deep sigh, and I looked at her just when her sigh was covered in silence, one leg over the other one, and two slim hands on the upper leg, a firm appearance, it might seem at first, but I don't look at her acts, I look into her eyes, where I can't do not even one mistake.

He eyes are kind, warm and filled with worry. Completely different from what she wants to show, or what she wants to pretend that she feels.

However, I realized that she didn't really want to be superior, or angry with me right now, because her voice it's also like her eyes.

"Sasuke, what's wrong?'

I looked at her further, but I knew she will wait for my answer. And so, I opened my mouth, but I've closed it back.

'I don't know what to say.' I thought, silently.

However, it seemed like she understood because she rose up from her seat, and standing in the right of the table, she has stretched her hand for me to accept.

I stood several seconds in pure confusion and unmoving. But I accepted it with no hesitation, as I also stood up and I also accepted her warm embrace.

But it was not enough and we both knew it.

We have walked to my apartment in my only bliss. In silence.

We somehow silently agreed that she will stay with me. I knew that this is the case when she has closed the door after us both, and locked it.

Even so, in the back of my mind I knew that she doesn't trust to leave me alone. Somehow, I wanted to make myself believe that I don't want her here, but without even wanting to admit it but knowing already, I am grateful for what she does.

I continued my road until I reached the bedroom and until I immediately collapsed on my own bed.

Hours have passed like minutes, and minutes have passed like seconds. I am so tired that I can't move at all, I want to get up but I can't.

I have repeatedly woke up while I slept, many times I have faced just the silence and the darkness of my room, and once, with the warmth which Felix's fur offers to me, and then, Celine kissing my forehead.

I didn't want to wake up, but bright powerful light have bothered my eyes until I forced them to open. I first saw Felix which stands right in front of my face and looks at me, waiting.

And behind her, Celine pulls at my curtains, so the sun can enter.

"Get up and shine!" She has sung and without knowing why, I rose up a little, staying on my butt on the bed, with my back against the wall, with half opened eyelids.

When she noticed this, she has pulled the curtains halfway, so the sun wouldn't bother me.

Somehow, it's like she knows exactly what to do.

"Good morning!" She has sung again and I refused to answer because my neck is dry, and so, I looked at my left, at my nightstand to see a tray with pancakes in chocolate syrup, strawberries everywhere and a healthy cup of coffee.

'You can read my mind?' I wanted to ask, but instead, I just smiled.

She has left for a while and then she came back just when I almost finished eating, and she gently sat down on the edge of my bed, took my left hand in hers, and just then, she has begun to talk:

"You have to talk to me, if you don't then I can't help you, it'll make you feel better, Sasuke, please..."

I have put the fork down and I stared out the window, I refused to look into her worried eyes.

"You already know." I said, and I was scared of my own voice, it was broken, like a voice of a dead.

'She is not so dumb that she won't realize that Naruto is no longer here...' I thought and just the thought has hurt me, I closed my eyes.

"I know, but you don't."

She said and I immediately looked at her with wide eyes. Surprised, maybe, annoyed, a little but more, I am angry with myself, angry that I will never accept the truth no matter what form it takes.

I've saw it in too many forms, imaginary and real. Cold humans, soulless, and humans with too much soul, I've been betrayed.

It doesn't matter that it's in front of me; I will deny it, just so I can protect myself.

'I, a coward.'

I didn't realize that I have closed my eyes until I had to open them, but I refused. And so, I kept them closed.

"Sasuke, don't do it again... don't lose the ones you love again...don't run away..."

She said almost in a whisper and I heard her so clear that I opened my eyes, which I can tell how they look, cold and insane.

"I didn't love him." I heard myself saying as I closed my eyes.

"You can lie to me, but don't lie to yourself...Sasuke, listen to me, you fell in love with him like you did with ..." She says almost crying.

"Don't you dare say his name in front of me!" My voice is low but angry and demanding.

With my eyes closed, I recall Naruto's smile, the real one.

"You fell in love with Naruto!" She said between tears, almost yelling.

"He was just a spoiled brat!" I heard myself saying with the same unfamiliar voice.

"He was just like you when you were younger, he did the same mistakes you did, when you first fell in love, you've also run ..." She said but I cut her off.

"Shut up! It's not true!" I almost yelled but with my eyes still closed.

"You know is true Sasuke! You just don't want to admit ..."

"Shut up!" I yelled.

"I'll prove that I am right!" She yelled.

I opened my eyes because I felt something on my lips, and then something wet and warm on my cheek falling down from my cheek, on her hand.

However, I know, I can't find the words that can tell the story that I want to write, I am wordless, I don't know the word that can express who I am, but I know what word can tell what and who you are along with me.

And in this silence, I can hear, and in this dim light, I can see … the unmasked truth.

To be continued…

It's not a very big chapter, sorry for that. But at least, it's a bit of action in it!

See you in two weeks; the next chapter might be up on 21, 22, or 23 October. On 30 October it's my birthday! Well 3 weeks until then... I will forget about it for sure, huh...

Hope everybody enjoyed the chapter.

PS: The same message with the poll that I have and the votes that I don't have.


	12. From the next chapter

This is not a new chapter, I couldn't make myself to finish it no matter how hard I tried, I am very sorry, this week, the time passed me by without letting me to finish anything, just to start something and then to let it unfinished. I am very sorry for this though...

This is a bit from the next chapter just so I won't let you without anything because I am really sorry.

The next chapter might be up in this week or even on 21, 22, or 23 October, and then I will continue to make it once per week, so Chapter 12 might be up on 28, 29, or 30 October. Hopefully someone will forgive me, I'm very sorry.

So, from the next chapter: 

I know it was supposed to be a long sunny summer  
>But somehow, drops of water have begun to fall from the sky,<br>The pouring rain which has called from somewhere a merciless wind  
>But the drops of water have become snowflakes, and I wonder...<br>'Where's my summer?'

Scarf after scarf, I search for your smell  
>But just air with no perfume I inhale over and over again,<br>In the ocean of faces, in the theatre filled with masks  
>I can't stop myself from looking at each one of them<br>'Where are you now?'

All alone I walk, and I have no destination at all  
>But all that I know, is that I am alone, searching for a dream...<br>Lost my faith, lost my hope in love but, I'm still...  
>Searching for a sign that might be right after the corner...<br>'No...Maybe the next one...'

Once, I knew how to smile, I felt alive...  
>But now, I can't remember how...<br>Once, I knew only one season, the summer...  
>But now, I can't find the sun... and I'm...I'm...<br>'I'm sorry I couldn't make you happy.'

Chapter 11: Goodbye, but I love you

"I see the white clouds moving along with the earth, I see this now, with my two black wide opened eyes, as if I'm curious, as if I'm searching for a sign in the sea of clouds that have countless colors. Even the shadows are masking the purple, blue or black, maybe even other colors.

The ghostly moon looks back at me with its unchanging stare, as if asking me: 'Why do I waste the fact that despite being a dot for her on this planet, I don't move, like I am a planet, rotating around the sun, along with all the other planets, being no different, not even trying to be different anymore.

Thinking very silently, within myself: 'Around the sun, or around you… almost burned.'

Somehow, I'm waiting for the moon itself, to tell me: 'Go after him'; but it just makes me feel even more worthless, or even more desperate and shameful.

The wind hides himself around the tress, moving the leaves, whispering to me, and the white clouds slowly becoming even more colorful, but sad, with a grey color, as if I didn't already know: 'The storm is coming.' "

See you around this week, or on weekend. Again, sorry and thank you.


	13. Chapter 11:Goodbye,but I love you

I know it was supposed to be a long sunny summer  
>But somehow, drops of water have begun to fall from the sky,<br>The pouring rain which has called from somewhere a merciless wind  
>But the drops of water have become snowflakes, and I wonder...<br>'Where's my summer?'

Scarf after scarf, I search for your smell  
>But just air with no perfume I inhale over and over again,<br>In the ocean of faces, in the theatre filled with masks  
>I can't stop myself from looking at each one of them<br>'Where are you now?'

All alone I walk, and I have no destination at all  
>But all that I know, is that I am alone, searching for a dream...<br>Lost my faith, lost my hope in love but, I'm still...  
>Searching for a sign that might be right after the corner...<br>'No...Maybe the next one...'

Once, I knew how to smile, I felt alive...  
>But now, I can't remember how...<br>Once, I knew only one season, the summer...  
>But now, I can't find the sun... and I'm...I'm...<br>'I'm sorry I couldn't make you happy.'

Chapter 11: Goodbye, but I love you

I opened my eyes because I felt something on my lips, and then something wet and warm on my cheek falling down from my cheek, on her hand.

However, I know, I can't find the words that can tell the story that I want to write, I am wordless, I don't know the word that can express who I am, but I know what word can tell what and who you are along with me.

And in this silence, I can hear, and in this dim light, I can see … the unmasked truth.

Maybe because you always loved me, Celine, and I always knew, and I have always ignored even the slightest sign, your care and your kindness toward me and towards all that I am.

'I don't deserve any of it.' I thought while your lips are retreating from my lips, and with black wide opened eyes, I stare at you.

With tears, which are still wet from your eyes to your cheek, and with a message so very clear within your eyes, message that I think it's also written in my eyes.

'But for whom are you crying, Celine? For me, for you, or for us? For Naruto?'

I wanted to ask this astray thought, but I opened my mouth, and I closed it, but my eyes, are still wide, open and attentive at her, as she's still in front of me.

None of us has moved, not even one centimeter, and you're still crying, and I still look at you, without saying anything, without doing anything to comfort you, like a heartless beast.

'I don't know what to do, and I don't know what to say...and I don't want you to misunderstand.' This thought was the last one thought made of confusion, because you have begun to speak with your head in the mattress, hiding yourself from me and with a broken voice.

I heard and I listened attentive, but I don't know what I should have to understand.

"I know you feel nothing for me and for women in general, so just go after him, not because he's a guy, but because you are so in love that you didn't even have had the decency to push me away."

Without thinking, like a child, my mouth spoke before my brain:

"Why ...?"

I almost asked, but I stopped myself and in the same time, she spoke to me:

"You didn't even realize...you didn't even notice that you are so worried that you don't even smoke anymore...you don't even feel the need. You forgot everything else, but..."

She said as she muffled her words further in the mattress, a low scream could be heard, but I was too shocked that I couldn't say anything.

It was confusing; in a way, but for a second…just for a second...this thought has crossed through my mind:

'I think I understand.'

After this whole scene, she has walked, or almost crawled slowly to the door of my room, and still without looking at me, she whispered to me:

"If you leave, I'll take care of Felix, you don't have to worry about anything. But if you don't leave…if you don't leave…"

She finished nervous and with a sigh, at a loss of words.  
>Nevertheless, before she left and to close the door after her, I also whispered to her:<p>

"I know."

And with that, she closed the door after her, and I remained there, in my bed, looking at the window, to realize that it's barely afternoon.

And as always, I get the same feeling, the feeling which I've always had, since I was a kid.

'When I look at a window, I feel like caged bird. Like a prisoner in a prison. Like...like...me.'

I stood here for more than I could estimate, thinking at nothing at all, even if I already know that in my subconscious, the scene it's playing repeatedly in my mind, like an endless movie.

Analyzing every detail, with the experience of an expert, but still, with eyes like of a child.

However, I refused to draw a conclusion from it.  
>Without realizing or maybe, without letting myself to realize my actions, I got up from my bed.<p>

With a firm ambition to don't let the truth visible in my mind, reachable, or even existent; ignoring it with my entire might.

Every single thought that could interfere, that could make me stop in my tracks, or that could make me be a coward again.

'This time, I'll fight.'

I walked to the closet, and I changed my clothes to something that can keep me warm, but won't make me look like I have 10 kg, more than I have.  
>As I did this, I refused to look in the mirror.<p>

And like this, I quickly stared at my hand on the knob of the entrance door.

'Is this the right decision?' I asked myself, me, and no one else.

However, I heard a caterwaul behind me, and I looked, to see Felix with a spark in her eyes, a spark which I only saw once, but this has happened a long time ago, this is the second time when I see it in my life.

But now, I know what I have to do.

"I promise that this time… I'll bring him back."

I said to Felix in the pure silence of my apartment but even so, I saw Celine's shadow in the kitchen, and I knew that she heard me, and I even heard her voice whispering to me, or to the silence, barely audible but I heard it, as I closed the entrance door.

She whispered: "Goodbye."

And I know that she looks at me as I got out of the block, out of her way, our of her visual range, and out…

I know, but I let her think that I don't know that she looks at me, that she's still crying and like this, I let her have a least bit of dignity, so she will be able to get up from the floor.

'I'm sorry.'

And like this, my steps have carried me to the only place that they could carry me; the only place that they know right now.

Pavement slowly became to look like a painting with its colorful leaves on it, and the trees are many, green and all around me, almost covering the sky, so I have to look ahead, to see it.

I see the white clouds moving along with the earth, I see this now, with my two black wide opened eyes, as if I'm curious, as if I'm searching for a sign in the sea of clouds that have countless colors. Even the shadows are masking the purple, blue or black, maybe even other colors.

The ghostly moon looks back at me with its unchanging stare, as if asking me: 'Why do I waste the fact that despite being a dot for her on this planet, I don't move, like I am a planet, rotating around the sun, along with all the other planets, being no different, not even trying to be different anymore.

Thinking very silently, within myself: 'Around the sun, or around you… almost burned.'

Somehow, I'm waiting for the moon itself, to tell me: 'Go after him'; but it just makes me feel even more worthless, or even more desperate and shameful.

The wind hides himself around the tress, moving the leaves, whispering to me, and the white clouds slowly becoming even more colorful, but sad, with a grey color, as if I didn't already know:

'The storm is coming.'

I thought it while I sigh, and I looked just in front of me, at the unchangeable view. I look at the small pavement of the park and at the green tress, not too high, nor too small, but while they are dancing a little with the kind breeze of the quiet wind while the noisy ones are the leaves.

The lake at my right, and the road in front of me, while …

I've quickly looked at my left, because of pure intuition, at a bank that it's not empty but changed, with a boy sitting on it, in a quite rude posture, as if sleeping there but not looking like a beggar either.

But even so, this time, I was the first one to speak.

To be continued…

Not an incredible long chapter and many things happen in a way but in another way, it's like nothing happens. However, I hope you know who's on that bank…I won't tell you until the next chapter but still…

However, I have a new poll, if anybody is interested, of course.

And the next chapter will be up on 28, 29, or 30 October.

I don't particularly like this chapter but I have a writer's block and that's why I think it's not really great, it was really hard to write, and I know you'll be asking: What was so hard to write?

Well, when you have no mood to write but you want to write, and have a kind of an idea but in the same time, a writer's block, it gets hard, and that's why this chapter is so small and lame, but it was a 'must' to happen.

The next chapter will be more interesting, I promise.

See you next time; hope everybody liked it, thank you!


	14. Chapter 12:Oh,lust is a must

Someone out there, please…

Try and believe me…

These words have lost their meaning,

Or at least to me…

Then my life has lost its meaning,

Trust is dust, hope is a must.

You can have wings, but in a cage...

It wouldn't matter less.

In a hopeless place

Filled with 'the loveless'

Time is precious…

'Cause soon... here comes the earthquake!

All that you've ever built will turn to ashes...

Dirty trying to come clean

With black on white,

Pray, but make a sin along

Oh...it all lost its meaning

Oh... (in) the mirage of lust.

Chapter 12: Oh, lust is a must

The wind hides himself around the tress, moving the leaves, whispering to me, and the white clouds slowly becoming even more colorful, but sad, with a grey color, as if I didn't already know:

'The storm is coming.'

I thought it while I sigh, and I looked just in front of me, at the unchangeable view. I look at the small pavement of the park and at the green tress, not too high, nor too small, but while they are dancing a little with the kind breeze of the quiet wind while the noisy ones are the leaves.

The lake at my right, and the road in front of me, while …

I've quickly looked at my left, because of pure intuition, at a bank that it's not empty but changed, with a boy sitting on it, in a quite rude posture, as if sleeping there but not looking like a beggar either.

But even so, this time, I was the first one to speak.

"Naruto…" That's all that I could say. His name. Half of his name.

'Cause then, my mouth had no more words, no more sounds wanted came out, I even forced myself to speak at one certain moment ,but it is as if my voice has left along with the wind, quietly hiding behind the trees, under the water of the lake, above the clouds, unreachable.

Or, as if, it wasn't there to begin with.

However, its wide smile, invites me, but no matter how contagious it is, I'm too surprised that I've been able to find him here, once again.

'No, that's a lie; I'm not surprised at all… I knew he'd be here… I knew it all along… '

Somehow while staring into blue eyes; I realized that I'm waiting. I am the one that's waiting to be saved; by him. It's as if, he wasn't the one who needed to be saved from the very start.

'I was…hiding from him…running from him…I was the… the…'

The endless rows filled with infinite words, like the endless tress filled with always regenerating leaves, undying, immortal, and so are my words, my thoughts, growing, wider, greener, or…sicker.

I didn't realized that I was staring at the pavement, while thinking, but I stopped thinking, and rose my head up, my eyes wide open, but I was the last one to look up, 'cause they all stopped to stare, all the words, all the leaves, stopped when the wind stopped, even the moon asked the sun to turn off the light for one second, just to be able stare into his blue eyes, just to hear his voice, whispering to me:

"I knew that you'll come."

The eclipse was so sudden, so quick, as if a shadow of a ghost has passed before the sun, covering the whole earth for some mere seconds.

However, none of us has moved, none of us has blinked, and certainly, we both felt the same feeling, we both thought the same thought, right after the ghost has left us, to haunt someone else's world.

Clear like the day, and dense as the dark, our silence has danced, together.

I closed my eyes, several seconds have passed, until I've felt the wind blowing again, playing with my hair.

Then, very close to me, the smell, of a cigarette.

I opened my eyes, to see Naruto inhaling from a cigarette just two millimeters away from me. Now standing, in front of me.

I opened my mouth to scold him. Just to stay with my lips parted, but with no word coming out, instead, pushed back to create others, to grow them, wider, greener … or sicker.

While white smoke of cigarette was blown into my mouth, from Naruto's mouth.

I looked up from his lips, to his azure eyes. To see that they are also looking into mine, exploring, asking, and above them all, creating.

The white smoke was swallowed by the night, and by the rays of the sun, behind the moon.

And I couldn't decide, and neither could he, 'cause his lips, his eyes, again and again, eyelashes up and eyelashes down, until, I couldn't take it anymore.

Devoured by lust, I tasted rose petals.

To be continued …

Sorry for taking so long, my computer died, everything has been deleted, all the stories, poems, I feel like crying…anyway, again sorry, couldn't do much about it. This computer works horrible, that's why the chapter is so short, very short but filled with well, one event, ehh... I said it will be interesting and I wish I could give you more, but as I said, this computer blocks per minute…for real!

But I am not dead! At least now you know that…Ahem.  
>However, hope I'll be able to post soon, oh, and also, it's hard to correct so if you see any mistake, tell me where, if you want to, of course, it'd be a great help…thank you.<p>

My computer will be fixed very very soon! Hope you'll tell me your idea about this, is it too soon? Too late? What do you think? Giving a whole chapter (though short) just to a kiss?

Hope everybody likes the chapter.


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